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“‘Crank 3’ is going to happen,” says director Mark Neveldine

“‘Crank 3’ is going to happen,” says director Mark Neveldine (photo)

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You guys don’t need to get me a present for my birthday (*coughDecember23cough*) anymore. I already got everything I wanted. That’s because Mark Neveldine — one half of the brilliant writing/directing tandem Neveldine/Taylor” — told Empire that “Crank 3” — the second sequel to “Crank,” a.k.a. one of the best action movies of the last decade, and the first sequel to “Crank: High Voltage,” a.k.a. one of the craziest action movies of the last millenium — is “going to happen.”

Empire was talking with Neveldine about his upcoming “Ghost Rider” sequel with Nicolas Cage, “Spirit of Vengeance” and asked whether he’d like to see “Vengeance” co-star Idris Elba join the next installment in the “Crank” franchise alongside series god star Jason Statham. Here’s what he said:

“I would LOVE that! Actually, we joking-but-not-quite-jokingly joked about that with Idris while we were over in Romania and Turkey. Just trying to figure out a way of getting him into ‘Crank 3.’ There are so many different ways that ‘Crank 3’ could go. We’ve been talking about the top 50 ideas we what to do for ‘Crank 3,’ so we’re just trying to pair them down. By the way, ‘Crank 3’ is going to happen, the studios are really excited about it — it’s just all about timing.”

And cue wildly enthusiastic cheering…

Here is my advice to Neveldine and Taylor if they truly have fifty different ideas for what to do in “Crank 3:” Just make them all. I will watch 50 more “Crank” movies. In each one, Statham can have a different debilitating handicap that requires all manner of recharging or juicing or having sex in public (if you haven’t seen the first two films, having sex in public is a weirdly important part of the “Crank” mythos). Like maybe “Crank 3” could be called “Crank: Hungry Heart” and in that one Statham’s artificial heart is replaced with a sentient alien creature from space that needs to constantly eat human flesh to survive. And then they follow that with “Crank: I Sock It,” where Chev Chelios goes blind and he receives new robotic eye implants that shoot death lasers, but they require a constant supply of Visine drops, so he has to keep schlepping out to CVS.

You get the idea. The possibilities really are endless. I hope we get to see them all.

Psyched for “Crank 3?” Say yes, or we’re never talking again. Leave us your exciting comments below or write to us on Facebook and Twitter.

[H/T JoBlo]


Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.


Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.

Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…


A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.


Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.