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“Malcolm in the Middle” Premieres Tonight on IFC

“Malcolm in the Middle” Premieres Tonight on IFC (photo)

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“Malcolm in the Middle” premieres tonight on IFC with back-to-back episodes beginning at 6 p.m. ET. If you didn’t watch the show when it originally aired from 2000-2006, you will want to tune in to one of the most inventive and creative comedies around. If you did see the Emmy-winning comedy, we know you’ll be on your couch laughing. The show follows Malcolm, who despite being a certified genius is just a a regular kid trying to navigate his way through the horrors of middle school and early adolescence. Like average kids his age, Malcolm has a complete misunderstanding of girls, an eclectic group of classmates to try and get along with, and the constant burden of masterminding plans to get himself and his three brothers either into or out of trouble. Plus he has to handle his no-nonsense mom Lois (Jane Kaczmarek) who is outspoken, opinionated and very wary of her four sons and their antics. Luckily for her, she is a master of creative punishments and almost manages to keep Francis, Reese, Malcolm, and Dewey in line even if she doesn’t get much help from Malcolm’s dad Hal (Bryan Cranston). is a certified legend in his own mind, who is perfectly content to let Lois “wear the pants”, but often finds himself creating more chaos than his four boys combined. We are excited to have “Malcolm in the Middle” on the air and we know you will be too:

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“Malcolm in the Middle” premieres on IFC tonight at 6 and 6:30 p.m. ET

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Face Melting Cameos

The 10 Most Metal Pop Culture Cameos

Glenn Danzig drops by Portlandia tonight at 10P on IFC.

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Glenn Danzig rocks harder than granite. In his 60 years, he’s mastered punk with The Misfits, slayed metal with the eponymous Danzig, and generally melted faces with the force of his voice. And thanks to Fred and Carrie, he’s now stopping by tonight’s brand new Portlandia so we can finally get to see what “Evil Elvis” is like when he hits the beach. To celebrate his appearance, we put together our favorite metal moments from pop culture, from the sublime to the absurd.

10. Cannibal Corpse meets Ace Ventura

Back in the ’90s,  Cannibal Corpse was just a small time band from Upstate New York, plying their death metal wares wherever they could find a crowd, when a call from Jim Carry transformed their lives. Turns out the actor was a fan, and wanted them for a cameo in his new movie, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. The band had a European tour coming up, and were wary of being made fun of, so they turned it down. Thankfully, the rubber-faced In Living Color vet wouldn’t take no for an answer, proving that you don’t need to have a lot of fans, just the right ones.


9. AC/DC in Private Parts

Howard Stern’s autobiographical film, based on his book of the same name, followed his rise in the world of radio and pop culture. For a man surrounded by naked ladies and adoring fans, it’s hard to track the exact moment he made it. But rocking out with AC/DC in the middle of Central Park, as throngs of fans clamor to get a piece of you, seems like it comes pretty close. You can actually see Stern go from hit host to radio god in this clip, as “You Shook Me All Night Long” blasts in the background.


8. Judas Priest meets The Simpsons

When you want to blast a bunch of peace-loving hippies out on their asses, you’re going to need some death metal. At least, that’s what the folks at The Simpsons thought when they set up this cameo from the metal gods. Unfortunately, thanks to a hearty online backlash, the writers of the classic series were soon informed that Judas Priest, while many things, are not in fact “death metal.” This led to the most Simpson-esque apology ever. Rock on, Bartman. Rock on.


7. Anthrax on Married…With Children

What do you get when Married…with Children spoofs My Dinner With Andre, substituting the erudite playwrights for a band so metal they piss rust? Well, for starters, a lot of headbanging, property destruction and blown eardrums. And much like everything else in life, Al seems to have missed the fun.


6. Motorhead rocks out on The Young Ones

The Young Ones didn’t just premiere on BBC2 in 1982 — it kicked the doors down to a new way of doing comedy. A full-on assault on the staid state of sitcoms, the show brought a punk rock vibe to the tired format, and in the process helped jumpstart a comedy revolution. For instance, where an old sitcom would just cut from one scene to the next, The Young Ones choose to have Lemmy and his crew deliver a raw version of “Ace of Spades.” The general attitude seemed to be, you don’t like this? Well, then F— you!


5. Red and Kitty Meet Kiss on That ’70s Show

Carsey-Werner Productions

Carsey-Werner Productions

Long before they were banished to playing arena football games, Kiss was the hottest ticket in rock. The gang from That ’70s Show got to live out every ’70s teen’s dream when they were set loose backstage at a Kiss concert, taking full advantage of groupies, ganja and hard rock.


4. Ronnie James Dio in Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny (NSFW, people!)

What does a young boy do when he was born to rock, and the world won’t let him? What tight compadre does he pray to for guidance and some sweet licks? If you’re a young Jables, half of “the world’s most awesome band,” you bow your head to Ronnie James Dio, aka the guy who freaking taught the world how to do the “Metal Horns.” Never before has a rock god been so literal than in this clip that turns it up to eleven.


3. Ozzy Osbourne in Trick or Treat

It’s hard to tell if Ozzy was trying his hardest here, or just didn’t give a flying f–k. What is clear is that, either way, it doesn’t really matter. Ozzy’s approach to acting seems to lean more heavily on Jack Daniels than sense memory, and yet seeing the slurry English rocker play a sex-obsessed televangelist is so ridiculous, he gets a free pass. Taking part in the cult horror Trick or Treat, Ozzy proves that he makes things better just by showing up. Because that’s exactly what he did here. Showed up. And it rocks.


2. Glenn Danzig on Portlandia

Danzig seems to be coming out of a self imposed exile these days. He just signed with a record company, and his appearance on Portlandia is reminding everyone how kick ass he truly is. Who else but “The Other Man in Black” could help Portland’s resident goths figure out what to wear to the beach? Carrie Brownstein called Danzig “amazing,” and he called Fred “a genius,” so this was a rare love fest for the progenitor of horror punk.


1. Alice Cooper in Wayne’s World

It’s surprising, sure, but for a scene that contains no music whatsoever, it’s probably the most famous metal moment in the history of film. When Alice Cooper informed Wayne and Garth that Milwaukee is actually pronounced “Milly-way-kay” back in 1992, he created one of the most famous scenes in comedy history. What’s more metal than that? Much like Wayne and Garth, we truly are not worthy.

Tune in to the”Whisker Wars” Season Finale Tonight

Tune in to the”Whisker Wars” Season Finale Tonight (photo)

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The “Whisker Wars” season finale airs tonight at 11 p.m. ET. That’s right after weeks of struggling to topple each other in face-to-face competitions across the U.S., Jack Passion, Myk O’Connor, Aarne Bielefeldt and the Austin Facial Hair Club are heading to the World Beard and Mustache Competition in Trondheim, Norway. In Norway, the teams will face off in different categories. Will Alex LaRoche take the freestyle beard crown or will he be felled, once again by the German beard masters? Will Jack Passion take the Full Beard Natural laurels for the third time? Or will there be an upset? Will Miletus Callahan-Barile and his Alaskan Whaler ever get any respect on the national stage? Perhaps more important, will the Austin Facial Hair Club secede from Beard Team USA and establish their own independent club? Tune in tonight at 11 p.m. ET to find out the answers to these questions in the season finale of “Whisker Wars.”

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The season finale of “Whisker Wars” airs tonight at 11 p.m. ET

The Onion News Network’s Brooke Alvarez Responds to the GOP Presidential Debate

The Onion News Network’s Brooke Alvarez Responds to the GOP Presidential Debate (photo)

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The Republican presidential campaign season is well under way. Last night GOP hopefuls met in Texas in a debate meant to help winnow the herd of potential candidates because much like the Highlander, there can be only one Republican presidential candidate. The Onion News Network’s Brooke Alvarez has the story:

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“The Onion News Network” returns to IFC on October 4th at 10 p.m. ET/9 CT

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