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DID YOU READ

Jerry Lewis and Marilyn Monroe did WHAT?!?

Jerry Lewis and Marilyn Monroe did WHAT?!? (photo)

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We don’t usually cover gossipy type stuff on IFC.com. But technically, I don’t think this qualifies as gossip. More like bragging.

Writer Amy Wallace spent eleven hours with legendary comedian and director Jerry Lewis recently, and turned their conversation into an excellent interview in the new issue of GQ. The wide-ranging profile covers the entire scope of Lewis’ life and career: how he came to comedy, why he became a director (Billy Wilder gave him a big push), and what keeps him working at age 85. They also talk about sex, which Lewis was apparently having a lot of back in the day. When pressed about famous Hollywood partners, Lewis first claims he doesn’t want to name names, but I guess when you’ve slept with one of the most beautiful women in recorded history, it’s hard to resist a little self-congratulation.

“In the midst of another story, Lewis is suddenly insistent that Marilyn Monroe and President Kennedy — with whom Lewis was close — never had the affair many believe they had. When I look skeptical, he turns stern. ‘I’m telling you what I know. Never! And the only reason I know is because I did. Okay?’

Wait, what??

He nods, adding that Monroe used sex like he uses humor: to make an emotional connection. ‘She needed that contact to be sure it was real.’

Okay, but what was it like, I ask, to make love to the most famously tragic sexpot of all time?

‘It was…’ he says, taking a beat, ‘long.’ He smiles ruefully. ‘I was crippled for a month.'”

What what whaaaat? The only conceivable reaction to this bombshell is a Jerry Lewis reaction: a spit take, a crazy face, and a high-pitched scream of “FLAVIN MAVIN SCHMAVIN HOT WITH THE NICE LADY WITH THE BIG THINGS AND THE NO GOOD!” Marilyn Monroe and Jerry Lewis? The woman who gave millions of men the seven year itch scratched up against the disorderly orderly? Apparently.

Obviously, Monroe isn’t around to confirm or deny this story. Do I believe it anyway? Yes. And I’ll tell you why. Because I want to believe it. If an attention whore as awkward and goofy as Jerry Lewis — no offense, Jer — can land Marilyn Monroe, it gives hope to all the awkward, goofy attention whores in the world. I just want to know how he managed not to gloat about it for fifty years.

Do you buy Jerry’s story? Tell us in the comments below or on Facebook and Twitter.

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.

via GIPHY

Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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