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Five “Fourquels” That Weren’t Terrible

Five “Fourquels” That Weren’t Terrible (photo)

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We love trilogies. They’re nice and neat. They conform to the three-act structure of storytelling. We love them so much that we want more movies even after the trilogy is over, which inevitably leads to the fourth film in a franchise — the fourquel, if you will (and if you’re an English teacher, you won’t). Most fourquels are classic examples of outstaying your welcome: “Batman and Robin,” “Superman IV: The Quest For Peace,” “Alien Resurrection,” “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull,” “Jaws: The Revenge,” “The Next Karate Kid,” and on and on and on (and on). Still, hope springs eternal for the great fourquel, like this week when we have the release of “Scre4m” directed by Wes Craven. With fingers crossed for this new “Scream,” we look back at five fourquels that were actually kind of good.


“Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home” (1986)
Directed by Leonard Nimoy

By the time any movie franchise reaches a fourth installment, all its rules and tropes have been rigidly codified into formula. “Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home” works so well because it gleefully subverts that formula. “Star Trek” always takes place in the future; this one is set in the past. The crew always flies the Starship Enterprise; this time they’ve got a stolen Klingon Bird-of-Prey. There’s always lots of outer space battles with fiendish villains; this installment goes for fish-out-of-water comedy. In other words, instead of robotically rehashing what audiences had come to expect from “Star Trek,” director Leonard Nimoy boldly went for something new (you see what I did there with the boldly went? Yeah, you did!). Because fourquels typically come loaded with continuity baggage, they rarely connect with a wider audience beyond the hardcore fans looking to live inside their happy memories of the previous films for two more hours. By tossing all that out, Nimoy made the most financially and creatively successful “Star Trek” until J.J. Abrams’ recent reboot.


“Sudden Impact” (1983)
Directed by Clint Eastwood

The fourth “Dirty Harry” is best known for the line “Go ahead: make my day,” (see below). But “Sudden Impact” is directed by Clint Eastwood and it marks an important step on his path toward becoming the creator of films like “Unforgiven” and “Letters From Iwo Jima.” “Sudden Impact” is still very much a Dirty Harry film — don’t expect to see America’s favorite grizzled cop treating suspects with things like dignity or respect — but it also places him into a story loaded with moral ambiguity (truth be told, most “Dirty Harry”s are a lot more complicated than they’re often given credit for). This time San Francisco Police Inspector Harry Callahan finds himself chasing a female vigilante (Sondra Locke) out to kill the men who raped her. While “Sudden Impact” remains part of the collective cultural lexicon because of the scene below where Eastwood breaks up a hold-up with his two pals Smith and Wesson, it’s much more interesting for the stuff that follows, that calls into question the old framework of good guys and bad guys, cops and robbers.


“Conquest of the Planet of the Apes” (1972)
Directed by J. Lee Thompson

I tend to think of prequels as the last, desperate act of creatively bankrupt movie serials; after all, one of the worst fourquels of all time is a prequel. When you couple the lack of suspense in a prequel, where the ending is a foregone conclusion, with the lack of suspense in a regular sequel, where we know everything about the tone and style and characters, what you typically get is a very boring movie (again, not to beat a dead horse here, but it’s true). If “Conquest of the Planet of the Apes” isn’t the best prequel of all time, it’s definitely the craziest. You know where things are eventually going in this story — loincloths, Dr. Zaius, “YOU MANIACS!” — but you could never predict the events that would lead there. Unless you always suspected the Planet of Apes was caused by a disease that kills the world’s cats and dogs, forcing apes to become household pets and eventually slaves, prompting a mass uprising at the ape training facility that’s actually the campus of the University of California at Irvine (in which case, congratulations! You’re Paul Dehn, and you’re the screenwriter of “Conquest of the Planet of the Apes”). The studio eventually softened the downer ending (SPOILER ALERT: THE APES GET THE PLANET!), but they couldn’t completely erase its chilling echoes of the racial divisions still simmering throughout the country in 1972. I guess in the strictest sense of the word, “Conquest” isn’t technically a prequel because two of the apes from the first and second film travel back through time in the third film, paradoxically kickstarting the chain of events that causes the fourth film and fifth films, later, the first and second. But either way, “Conquest” is a damn fine, damn demented fourquel.


“Live Free or Die Hard” (2007)
Directed by Len Wiseman

I’ve heard many complaints about the fourth “Die Hard” film: Bruce Willis isn’t playing John McClane so much as Bruce Willis, and the PG-13 rated violence is a big step backwards from the previous, R-rated installments. I’ll grant you both objections. Willis is kind of phoning it in and the overall level of murderousness — hey, if fourquel’s a word now, anything goes — isn’t quite as high as it could or should be. But even if it doesn’t quite capture the spirit of the original trilogy movies, “Live Free or Die Hard” does harken back the the larger category of 80s action films, where joie de vivre was much more important that irrelevant matters like logic or physics. Driving a car into a helicopter? Sure! Defeating a Harrier jet with a semi? Don’t mind if we do! “Live Free or Die Hard” bounces from one ludicrous set piece to the next; it’s easily the most physically active movie about computer hacking ever made. Yes, there are things in this movie that don’t make any sense. If they weren’t there, it wouldn’t be worth watching.


“Thunderball” (1965)
Directed Terrence Young

“Thunderball” is the last classic James Bond film, and even though it’s still a damn good time at the movies, you can already start to see the franchise begin to teeter on the edge of self-parody. This is the one where Bond flies with a jet pack (see below) and Blofeld bumps off henchman Dr. Evil-style with his deadly conference room chairs. But “Thunderball”‘s also the last time Connery was really invested in the character, and even if the plot gets cartoonish, Bond himself still has some edge; in the cold open, Bond attends a funeral, then punches the dead man’s widow square in the face (it turns out to be the “dead man” in disguise, but still). Terrence Young, who directed “Dr. No” and “From Russia With Love” returned for “Thunderball,” and he always brought a sense of real danger and intensity to the series’ action sequences (his secret, I think, is messy choreography which looks like two dudes really scrapping instead of a ballet). Plus the underwater finale is rightfully famous, Ken Adam’s production designs are gorgeous, and the final high note in Tom Jones’ theme song will rattle your cojones to their very core. “Thunderbaaaaaaaaaaaall!”


For Further Viewing: “Rocky IV,” for the training montage set to “Hearts on Fire,” “Land of the Dead,” where allegorical zombies invade Bush-era America, “Fast & Furious,” which recaptures the lunkheaded poetry that the series lost in its first two sequels, “Scary Movie 4,” funnier than you think (and don’t you give me that look), and “Lethal Weapon 4,” because this list is called “Five ‘Fourquels’ That Weren’t Terrible” not “Five ‘Fourquels’ That Were Good.”

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Bro and Tell

BFFs And Night Court For Sports

Bromance and Comeuppance On Two New Comedy Crib Series

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“Silicon Valley meets Girls meets black male educators with lots of unrealized potential.”

That’s how Carl Foreman Jr. and Anthony Gaskins categorize their new series Frank and Lamar which joins Joe Schiappa’s Sport Court in the latest wave of new series available now on IFC’s Comedy Crib. To better acquaint you with the newbies, we went right to the creators for their candid POVs. And they did not disappoint. Here are snippets of their interviews:

Frank and Lamar

via GIPHY

IFC: How would you describe Frank and Lamar to a fancy network executive you met in an elevator?
Carl: Best bros from college live and work together teaching at a fancy Manhattan private school, valiantly trying to transition into a more mature phase of personal and professional life while clinging to their boyish ways.

IFC: And to a friend of a friend you met in a bar?
Carl: The same way, slightly less coherent.

Anthony: I’d probably speak about it with much louder volume, due to the bar which would probably be playing the new Kendrick Lamar album. I might also include additional jokes about Carl, or unrelated political tangents.

Carl: He really delights in randomly slandering me for no reason. I get him back though. Our rapport on the page, screen, and in real life, comes out of a lot of that back and forth.

IFC: In what way is Frank and Lamar a poignant series for this moment in time?
Carl: It tells a story I feel most people aren’t familiar with, having young black males teach in a very affluent white world, while never making it expressly about that either. Then in tackling their personal lives, we see these three-dimensional guys navigate a pivotal moment in time from a perspective I feel mainstream audiences tend not to see portrayed.

Anthony: I feel like Frank and Lamar continues to push the envelope within the genre by presenting interesting and non stereotypical content about people of color. The fact that this show brought together so many talented creative people, from the cast and crew to the producers, who believe in the project, makes the work that much more intentional and truthful. I also think it’s pretty incredible that we got to employ many of our friends!

Sport Court

Sport Court gavel

IFC: How would you describe Sport Court to a fancy network executive you met in an elevator?
Joe: SPORT COURT follows Judge David Linda, a circuit court judge assigned to handle an ad hoc courtroom put together to prosecute rowdy fan behavior in the basement of the Hartford Ultradome. Think an updated Night Court.

IFC: How would you describe Sport Court to drunk friend of a friend you met in a bar?
Joe: Remember when you put those firecrackers down that guy’s pants at the baseball game? It’s about a judge who works in a court in the stadium that puts you in jail right then and there. I know, you actually did spend the night in jail, but imagine you went to court right that second and didn’t have to get your brother to take off work from GameStop to take you to your hearing.

IFC: Is there a method to your madness when coming up with sports fan faux pas?
Joe: I just think of the worst things that would ruin a sporting event for everyone. Peeing in the slushy machine in open view of a crowd seemed like a good one.

IFC: Honestly now, how many of the fan transgressions are things you’ve done or thought about doing?
Joe: I’ve thought about ripping out a whole row of chairs at a theater or stadium, so I would have my own private space. I like to think of that really whenever I have to sit crammed next to lots of people. Imagine the leg room!

Check out the full seasons of Frank and Lamar and Sport Court now on IFC’s Comedy Crib.

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Millennial Wisdom

Charles Speaks For Us All

Get to know Charles, the social media whiz of Brockmire.

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He may be an unlikely radio producer Brockmire, but Charles is #1 when it comes to delivering quips that tie a nice little bow on the absurdity of any given situation.

Charles also perfectly captures the jaded outlook of Millennials. Or at least Millennials as mythologized by marketers and news idiots. You know who you are.

Played superbly by Tyrel Jackson Williams, Charles’s quippy nuggets target just about any subject matter, from entry-level jobs in social media (“I plan on getting some experience here, then moving to New York to finally start my life.”) to the ramifications of fictional celebrity hookups (“Drake and Taylor Swift are dating! Albums y’all!”). But where he really nails the whole Millennial POV thing is when he comments on America’s second favorite past-time after type II diabetes: baseball.

Here are a few pearls.

On Baseball’s Lasting Cultural Relevance

“Baseball’s one of those old-timey things you don’t need anymore. Like cursive. Or email.”

On The Dramatic Value Of Double-Headers

“The only thing dumber than playing two boring-ass baseball games in one day is putting a two-hour delay between the boring-ass games.”

On Sartorial Tradition

“Is dressing badly just a thing for baseball, because that would explain his jacket.”

On Baseball, In A Nutshell

“Baseball is a f-cked up sport, and I want you to know it.”


Learn more about Charles in the behind-the-scenes video below.

And if you were born before the late ’80s and want to know what the kids think about Baseball, watch Brockmire Wednesdays at 10P on IFC.

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Crown Jules

Amanda Peet FTW on Brockmire

Amanda Peet brings it on Brockmire Wednesday at 10P on IFC.

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GIFS via Giphy

On Brockmire, Jules is the unexpected yin to Jim Brockmire’s yang. Which is saying a lot, because Brockmire’s yang is way out there. Played by Amanda Peet, Jules is hard-drinking, truth-spewing, baseball-loving…everything Brockmire is, and perhaps what he never expected to encounter in another human.

“We’re the same level of functional alcoholic.”


But Jules takes that commonality and transforms it into something special: a new beginning. A new beginning for failing minor league baseball team “The Frackers”, who suddenly about-face into a winning streak; and a new beginning for Brockmire, whose life gets a jumpstart when Jules lures him back to baseball. As for herself, her unexpected connection with Brockmire gives her own life a surprising and much needed goose.

“You’re a Goddamn Disaster and you’re starting To look good to me.”

This palpable dynamic adds depth and complexity to the narrative and pushes the series far beyond expected comedy. See for yourself in this behind-the-scenes video (and brace yourself for a unforgettable description of Brockmire’s genitals)…

Want more about Amanda Peet? She’s all over the place, and has even penned a recent self-reflective piece in the New York Times.

And of course you can watch the Jim-Jules relationship hysterically unfold in new episodes of Brockmire, every Wednesday at 10PM on IFC.

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