Four Loko Cans and Several Loco Filmmakers at “The FP”

Four Loko Cans and Several Loco Filmmakers at “The FP” (photo)

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Last night’s screening of SXFantastic selection “The FP” at the Alamo Ritz began — as apparently all screenings of “The FP” begin — with a ceremonial Four Loko chug race: Crew members, including the brotherly directing team of Brandon and Jason Trost, versus audience members. It was a goofy mood-setter, and maybe a bit of a warning: to fully appreciate their movie you might need to be drunk and high.

“The FP” stands for Frazier Park, the area of California where the Brothers Trost hail from and which, if “The FP” is to believed, is perhaps the white trashiest place on earth. In the Trosts’ demented vision the FP is a post-apocalyptic wasteland where rival gangs from “The 245″ and “The 248″ battle for control of the area’s alcohol by playing Dance Dance Revolution. Whoever controls the booze controls the hobos, and whoever controls the hobos can keep the ducks in the park fed. And what is a town with ducks?

(Footage of the Four Loko races at “The FP”)

It’s that sort of movie, the kind that doesn’t make any sense and is damn proud of it. “The FP” looks like something high school kids make with their parents’ video camera on weekends, only in this case it was made by two professional filmmakers nearing their 30s — Brandon is a busy cinematographer whose next project is the “Ghost Rider” sequel — a fact that makes the film’s subterraneanly low-grade production values that much more charming. Though the film’s interiors are strewn with debris and broken tech, outdoor scenes show Frazier Park as a normal-looking American town with houses and cars and trees. It seems like the only people who realize society has collapsed and been replaced by a retro-futuristic hellhole are the main characters.

They include co-director Jason Trost as the none-too-coincidentally named J-Tro, an eyepatch-wearing Dance Dance master with his brother B-Tro. In a hysterical pre-credits sequence that plays like an avant-retarde version of the Drago-Apollo fight from “Rocky IV,” B-Tro falls at the hands of the evil L Dubba E (Lee Valmassy), prompting one of those classic shots where you hook a camera to a crane and shoot straight down at the actors as they look up and shout “NOOOOOO!” Some time later, J-Tro is walking the earth a la Rambo in “First Blood” when his old running buddy KCDC (Art Hsu) finds him and begs him to come back to The FP to save their turf from L Dubba E. When he returns, he finds his crush Stacy (Caitlyn Folley) in L Dubba E’s arms. What’s a one-eyed, mulletted, white boy dancer to do?

The joke is the sheer ludicrousness of it all, a world built on Dance Dance Revolution populated by redneck douches who talk in hip hop slang, fighting over the lamest turf ever for the sake of feeding some ducks. The whole point is that there is no point — just like most 80s action movies that take themselves far too seriously. And that joke works in the beginning, during the big DDR battle, but it begins to wear a bit thin during the middle act. I wasn’t surprised to hear to learn “The FP” started as a short film because that’s exactly what it feels like: a great one-joke short film expanded into an undercooked one-joke feature film. The Trosts expanded their running time, but not their repertoire of material.

It was around the halfway point of “The FP,” as the audience’s natural laughter began to die down, that I first noticed the forced laughs and loud comments from the filmmakers’ row of seats at the Alamo. The Trosts brought a bunch of their crew members out to South By Southwest to celebrate their premiere, and they were really into the movie. At times, they laughed at every line — even the ones that weren’t intended as jokes. One member of the group hooted and yelled and even heckled the film a few times, despite a constant rain of shushes from the folks around her. The longer that went on, the more “The FP” began to feel like a giant inside joke foisted on an unsuspecting audience and less like the inspired experimental film about macho stupidity it appeared to be in its early brilliant moments.

If the Trosts and their entourage wanted to disrupt their own movie, I suppose that’s their right. “The FP” is a confrontational film with intentionally crappy design; perhaps sabotaging their own debut is just another twist of their meta-meta filmmaking approach. The movie’s supposed to be crummy, so maybe we’re supposed to have a crummy time watching it too? In that case, they should have made everyone chug a can of Four Loko.

(An excerpt from the post-film Q&A)

Gigi Does It Ice Skating

Gigi's Ready, Are You?

5 Ways to Get Ready for Tonight’s Gigi Does It

Catch Gigi Does It Mondays at 10:30P on IFC.

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Garfield might hate Mondays, but now that Gigi Does It is in its new time slot Mondays at 10:30P ET/PT, it’s your new favorite day of the week. Here are five ways you can get ready for tonight’s all-new episode.

1. Watch David Krumholtz Become Gigi

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Wondering how David Krumholtz transforms into Gigi? Check out a video time lapse to see the incredible work that goes on behind-the-scenes of Gigi Does It.

2. Get in Touch With Your Inner Kristy Yamatushy

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This week Gigi and Ricky hit the ice. Will they fall flat or soar like Olympic great Kristy Yamtushy?

3. See the Video That’s Too Hot for Facebook

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Gigi has a filthy mouth that is NSFW and Not Safe for Facebook. Check out the video Mark Zuckerberg doesn’t want you to see.

4. Read Gigi’s Book “Call Your Grandmother”

Call Your Grandmother

Gigi became an author recently when she self-published her heartwarming children’s book about the perils of forgetting to call your dear grandma. Read the story that could give Go the F**k to Sleep a run for its money on the bestseller charts.

5. Put on Something that Highlights Your Kishkes

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You’ll want to slip into something comfortable when you watch Gigi. Just ask poor Ricky.

Old School

Best Party Ever

Top 10 Wildest Parties in Movie History

Party on with the Benders season finale tonight at 10P ET/PT.

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With the Uncle Chubbys boys throwing a wild party for Karen and Paul this week on the season finale of Benders, we thought we’d pay tribute to the biggest and most badass parties ever thrown on the big screen. Which parties would you die to go to? Which ones are you most likely to die at from going to? Before you catch the Benders finale tonight at 10P ET/PT, check out our list of the craziest parties to ever grace the silver screen.

10. Bachelor Party

20th Century Fox

Name the last party you went to attended by Tom Hanks AND a literal high horse. And if you can, kudos.

9. Animal House

Universal Pictures

Hey, does anyone want to hear me play gui—Ah, Bluto, what the hell??!!

8. Old School

DreamWorks Pictures

DreamWorks Pictures

Kegs, a hot DJ, random streaking…the Old School party has it all. We’re betting Frank never made it to Bed, Bath and Beyond, though.

7. Revenge of the Nerds

Revenge of the Nerds Thriller

Ain’t no party like a nerd party, particularly when “Thriller” starts playing. Don’t forget the “Wonder Joints.”

6. Boogie Nights

Boogie Nights

If you ever find yourself at a party filled with ’70s adult film stars, remember to put a towel down.

5. House Party

New Line Cinema

If you’re wondering what the ’90s were like, watch any of the House Party movies. They were like this.

4. Can’t Hardly Wait

Columbia Pictures

This party is like an uncut blast of ever ’90s high school movie. When the kid from Hook is bringing down the house with an epic lip sync performance of “Paradise City,” you know it’s a good party.

3. Weird Science

Universal Pictures

Mutants, missiles and Kelly LeBrock. Whatever you do, don’t tell Chet!

2. Real Genius

TriStar Pictures

Val Kilmer knew the one secret to a kick-ass party. In a word, lasers!

1. Risky Business

Warner Brothers

Before there was Xenu, there were hookers. High school would never be the same.


Super Awkward

The 10 Most Hilariously Awkward Sex Comedies

Get racy with Gigi Does It Mondays at 10:30P.

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Let’s face it: sex is innately funny. Body parts squishing together is always a recipe for potential awkwardness. So it’s only natural that Hollywood has mined the beast with two backs for comedy since the mid-­1950s. With Gigi getting her groove back on this week’s Gigi Does It, we thought we’d spotlight the 10 most hilariously awkward sex comedies ever lensed, from sci­fi parodies to touching teen romances.

10. Porky’s

Set in the 1950s, Bob Clark’s 1981 hit comedy follows a group of high school kids who want to lose their virginity, and travel to a nightclub in the Florida Everglades to do it. This kicks off a string of comical events that includes a “peeping on the girls locker room” scene that has been endlessly homaged and parodied. Porky’s was a massive critical flop on release, but thanks to VHS and cable airings it became a sweaty ’80s classic.

9. The Virginity Hit

The 2010 comedy The Virginity Hit takes the found­ footage approach from flicks like Paranormal Activity and transplants it into the much scarier world of high school sex and YouTube humiliation. This underrated movie laid the groundwork for a potential “third wave” of sex comedies.

8. Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex* (*But Were Afraid to Ask)

Woody Allen took a best­selling advice book and transformed it into this episodic comedy that cast a baleful eye on sex in the Free Love decade. The stellar cast (Gene Wilder! Burt Reynolds! Lynn Redgrave!) deliver some of the bits that rank among the best in Allen’s career. The rapid­-fire pace lets The Woodman touch on all manner of sexual deviancy, and the movie’s climax — in which the director plays a sperm getting ready to blast off into the throes of orgasm –­ is one of cinema’s most iconic moments.

7. Orgazmo

South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone have never shied away from getting explicit, and their NC­-17 sex comedy was an early taste of the duo’s outrageous humor. A young Mormon missionary comes to Los Angeles to try and save souls and winds up getting hired to star in a superhero-­themed porno. When his costar invents a ray gun that gives people orgasms, all Hell (and hilarity) breaks loose.

6. Superbad

This Judd Apatow-produced hit brought teen comedies into the age of the overshare with its mix of teenage awkwardness, uproarious gags and a healthy bromance between leads Michael Cera and Jonah Hill.

5. American Pie

The second great era of sex comedies kicked off in 1999 with this remarkably ribald ensenble flick about a quartet of friends trying to lose their virginity before they graduate high school. American Pie takes its name from the scene where Jason Biggs gets caught in a compromising position with some pastry, but the movie has multiple unforgettable bits, particularly Alyson Hannigan’s reverie about band camp.

4. There’s Something About Mary

The Farrelly Brothers cemented their position as a comedic powerhouse with this still hilarious Ben Stiller/Cameron Diaz rom com. Rarely has a film that involves testicular injury and unfortunate choices in hair gel been so sweet.

3. The 40-Year-Old Virgin

Judd Apatow proved that sex comedies aren’t just for teens with his breakthrough big screen comedy which cast Steve Carell as the titular middle-aged virgin. Although there’s plenty of erotic tomfoolery in this flick, it’s the real sense of heart and emotional consequence that makes it a classic.

2. The Girl Next Door

The normalization of pornography has drastically changed the way we think about sex, and 2004’s The Girl Next Door wrings tons of laughs from what happens when dirty movies hit a little too close to home. Elisha Cuthbert is the not-so-innocent girl next door who helps Emile Hirsch find new purpose in his life. A surprisingly dark and high-­quality outing for a film that was marketed as “American Porn.”

1. The Graduate

Single­-handedly responsible for introducing the concept of the “MILF” to American culture, Mike Nichols’ 1967 comedy features genre­-defining performances from Dustin Hoffman and Anne Bancroft as a recent college graduate and the older woman he hooks up with. Sex is integral to The Graduate‘s plot and premise — it’s the fulcrum of the emotional conflict, not just thrown in for titillation, making for one of the best comedies of all time.

Ghostbusters Everett

Ghostbusters In Hell?

7 Lost Ghostbusters Movies That Almost Happened

Catch a Ghostbusters marathon Saturday, Nov. 7th starting at 8P.

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With a new Ghostbusters movie set to debut next year, it’s time to start getting ready for an all out blitz of slime-flavored nostalgia. It’s been 26 years since we’ve seen a Ghostbuster on the big screen, although it hasn’t been for a lack of trying. Ray Stantz himself, Dan Aykroyd, has fought to make another movie in the franchise for decades. Bill Murray famously stood in the way of his efforts, refusing to even read a script. But behind this Ghostbusters Cold War, there were always a plethora of rumors, many coming from Aykroyd himself. Before you catch the Ghostbusters movies this month on IFC, check out a few of the Ghostbusters projects that could’ve been.

1. Ghostbusters in the Future

Columbia Pictures

In Making Ghostbusters by Don Shay, director Ivan Reitman recalled the stacks of pages Aykroyd had spent years putting together when he first joined the project. Originally conceived as a Blues Brothers-esque romp for Aykroyd and John Belushi, the early versions of the script saw a team of “Ghostsmashers” battling demons through a variety of “different planets or dimensional planes.” Reitman describes the first pages as one unending action sequence that was heavy on the ghost busting, light on anything else. He guessed those 50 pages would cost hundreds of millions of dollars (and these are ’80s dollars, remember) so the team went back to the drawing board.

2. Ghostbusters: The Next Generation

Paramount Pictures

Many considered Ghostbusters II a disappointment. Murray supposedly described it as “a whole lot of slime, and not much of us.” Apparently Aykroyd wasn’t in that camp, almost immediately starting work on ideas for a third film. The concept he quickly hit on, and has seemingly continued to champion in one form or another for the last two decades, was the idea of introducing a new, young crop of Ghostbusters. Over the years the rumors of who these new ‘busters might be, often started by Aykroyd himself, have included everyone from comedy superstars to TV witches. Chris Farley, Will Smith, Chris Rock, and Ben Stiller all seem like obvious choices. As time went on Bill Hader, Seth Rogen and Anna Faris joined the list. But Alyssa Milano, Eliza Dushku and Criminal Minds actor Matthew Gray Gubler? Aykroyd may have been drinking a bit too much of his Crystal Skull vodka at that point.

3. Ghostbusters Vs. Greek Gods

Columbia Pictures

In the late ’90s, rumors started to circulate that a script for a third Ghostbusters was ready to go. An early indication of how to sidestep Murray’s involvement, this outing would deal with Egon and Ray trying to keep the business afloat while battling Hades, Greek God of the Underworld. But it appears those rumors were just that. No script has ever seen the light of day.

4. Ghostbusters 3: Hellbent

Aykroyd, along with former SNL writer Tom Davis, penned the script for this iteration. The concept involved the Ghostbusters being sucked into an alternate version of Manhattan, called Manhellton, where the people and places of New York City were replaced by demonic versions. Of course, a new crew was involved. IGN reported at the time that the new team included a pierced New Jersey punk, a “pretty but uptight gymnast,” a “Latino beauty,” a “dread-locked dude” and a young genius whose giant brain made his head comically over-sized. The main villain was reportedly the Devil by way of Donald Trump, which shows Aykroyd may hate ghosts, but he might just be psychic. While the script was never produced (Murray dubbed it “too crazy to comprehend), the story was repurposed as a video game in 2009, with the original cast reprising their roles.

5. Ghostbusters: Cadets

Columbia Pictures

In 2009, Aykroyd and Ramis were at it again, talking up the idea of a new generation of Ghostbusters. Though Murray still wasn’t on board, Aykroyd laid out his vision for the threequel, which would center on the team “learning how to use the psychotron, the accelerators…all these great tools that they’re going to have.” Um…okay? What’s wrong with good ol’ fashioned proton packs?

6. Ghostbusters 3: Grumpy Old ‘Busters


In 2011, Aykroyd dropped hints that the original Ghostbusters would return, even without Murray’s involvement. This time the script would play up their age, adding “My character, Ray, is now blind in one eye and can’t drive the Cadillac…He’s got a bad knee and can’t carry the packs…Egon is too large to get into the harness.” Thank Gozer we never had to see Ray huffing and puffing while carrying a proton pack.

7. Ghostbusters 3: The Return of Oscar?

Columbia Pictures

With Aykroyd trying, and failing, over and over again to get something going, Harold Ramis decided to step in. He hired The Office scribes Gene Stupnitsky and Lee Eisenberg, who also wrote Ramis’ big screen comedy Year One, to put together a script from scratch. Supposedly centered on Peter Venkman and Dana Barrett’s grown son Oscar joining the team, there was some momentum. Once again, Murray still refused to play ball, reportedly shredding a copy of the script and joking he would only appear in the film as a ghost. With the studio refusing to move ahead without Murray’s involvement, the project petered out. The final nail in the coffin appears to be Year One itself. Murray said in a interview at the time, “Well, I never went to see Year One, but people who did, including other Ghostbusters, said it was one of the worst things they had ever seen in their lives.”

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