DID YOU READ

The Unofficial IFC Gift Guide

The Unofficial IFC Gift Guide (photo)

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Tick tock, tick tock. The number of shopping days in which you can safely get away without paying exorbitant overnight shipping fees and still get presents into deserving (or at least, greedy) hands by Christmas are swiftly trickling away. Whatever shall you buy your nearest and dearest to both say “I love you” and “There’s a recession on, bitches”? Don’t worry, IFC is here to help all you procrastinators and mall haters with your Christmas shopping needs. With our list and your credit card, while Santa’s still trying to cram that 96″ 3-D enabled plasma screen television down the chimney, you will be done shopping and sitting by the fireplace, cracking open an Old Style, chomping on a candy cane, and listening to rappers singing, “Ho ho ho.” And that is the true meaning of Christmas.

Here’s What to Buy To Make Your Friends Happy and Santa Jealous:

11. Tupac and/or Mickey Rourke Art. Heck, pay an artist to air brush them both onto the back of your acid-washed jean jacket.

10. Bob Dylan’s Hand-Written Lyrics. Perfect for your baby boomer parents who haven’t yet recognized that Kanye West is the new Bob Dylan. Or was it M. Ward is the new Bob Dylan? Or maybe Bob Dylan is the new Bob Dylan? Whatever, just buy it.

9. Porn. Every man in your family will totally get it. In fact, it would be on the top of their Christmas list if they weren’t convinced those little elves would swipe it for themselves.

8. Stocking Stuffers. People don’t hang their socks on the wall for nothing! Fill those puppies with a variety of excellent DVDs, including all the extras.

7. Red Faction: Guerrilla. Our resident gamer is playing a level a day of this game. Buy a copy so you and all your friends can play along at home.

6. A Geekgasm. When you give the geeks on your list the DVD trio of “Inception” “Cronos” and “Videodrome”, you are giving love and understanding.

5. A Field of Dreams. Or rather the field of dreams.

4. The 10 Best Straight-to-DVD releases of the year. Help your friends and loved ones increase their indie cred by introducing them to some excellent movies that weren’t shown at the local cineplex.

3. The Danny Elfman Music Box. You know you want it, so of course your grandma does too.

2. Wilco Coffee. Wake up to the fresh taste of Jeff Tweedy in your cup. Mmmm.

1. The Corleone Mansion. If anyone on your list claims they don’t want this, just call them “Fredo” until they change their mind. For infinity if necessary.

See also: Chuck Norris Gift Guide

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Millennial Wisdom

Charles Speaks For Us All

Get to know Charles, the social media whiz of Brockmire.

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He may be an unlikely radio producer Brockmire, but Charles is #1 when it comes to delivering quips that tie a nice little bow on the absurdity of any given situation.

Charles also perfectly captures the jaded outlook of Millennials. Or at least Millennials as mythologized by marketers and news idiots. You know who you are.

Played superbly by Tyrel Jackson Williams, Charles’s quippy nuggets target just about any subject matter, from entry-level jobs in social media (“I plan on getting some experience here, then moving to New York to finally start my life.”) to the ramifications of fictional celebrity hookups (“Drake and Taylor Swift are dating! Albums y’all!”). But where he really nails the whole Millennial POV thing is when he comments on America’s second favorite past-time after type II diabetes: baseball.

Here are a few pearls.

On Baseball’s Lasting Cultural Relevance

“Baseball’s one of those old-timey things you don’t need anymore. Like cursive. Or email.”

On The Dramatic Value Of Double-Headers

“The only thing dumber than playing two boring-ass baseball games in one day is putting a two-hour delay between the boring-ass games.”

On Sartorial Tradition

“Is dressing badly just a thing for baseball, because that would explain his jacket.”

On Baseball, In A Nutshell

“Baseball is a f-cked up sport, and I want you to know it.”


Learn more about Charles in the behind-the-scenes video below.

And if you were born before the late ’80s and want to know what the kids think about Baseball, watch Brockmire Wednesdays at 10P on IFC.

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Crown Jules

Amanda Peet FTW on Brockmire

Amanda Peet brings it on Brockmire Wednesday at 10P on IFC.

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On Brockmire, Jules is the unexpected yin to Jim Brockmire’s yang. Which is saying a lot, because Brockmire’s yang is way out there. Played by Amanda Peet, Jules is hard-drinking, truth-spewing, baseball-loving…everything Brockmire is, and perhaps what he never expected to encounter in another human.

“We’re the same level of functional alcoholic.”


But Jules takes that commonality and transforms it into something special: a new beginning. A new beginning for failing minor league baseball team “The Frackers”, who suddenly about-face into a winning streak; and a new beginning for Brockmire, whose life gets a jumpstart when Jules lures him back to baseball. As for herself, her unexpected connection with Brockmire gives her own life a surprising and much needed goose.

“You’re a Goddamn Disaster and you’re starting To look good to me.”

This palpable dynamic adds depth and complexity to the narrative and pushes the series far beyond expected comedy. See for yourself in this behind-the-scenes video (and brace yourself for a unforgettable description of Brockmire’s genitals)…

Want more about Amanda Peet? She’s all over the place, and has even penned a recent self-reflective piece in the New York Times.

And of course you can watch the Jim-Jules relationship hysterically unfold in new episodes of Brockmire, every Wednesday at 10PM on IFC.

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Draught Pick

Sam Adams “Keeps It Brockmire”

All New Brockmire airs Wednesdays at 10P on IFC.

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From baseball to beer, Jim Brockmire calls ’em like he sees ’em.

via GIPHY

It’s no wonder at all, then, that Sam Adams would reach out to Brockmire to be their shockingly-honest (and inevitably short-term) new spokesperson. Unscripted and unrestrained, he’ll talk straight about Sam—and we’ll take his word. Check out this new testimonial for proof:

See more Brockmire Wednesdays at 10P on IFC, presented by Samuel Adams. Good f***** beer.

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