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A Guide To Hating The Beatles

A Guide To Hating The Beatles (photo)

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I don’t hate the Beatles in the least bit, but for a long time I did take an unpopular position against them, mostly just as a knee jerk reaction against the mainstream. All the cheap merchandise, the overexposure, the boppy fans who just listen to what is fed to them over the radio and don’t make much effort to educate themselves about music… it can really start to weigh on a guy. Sometimes you have to lash out and loudly declare that the “Beatles suck, this record is overplayed suck,” at your girlfriend’s birthday party when she puts on “Sgt. Pepper’s,” her favorite album, and just stand there drinking bourbon straight from the bottle while her horrified girlfriends look on.

Yeah, nobody likes that guy. But sometimes, you have to shake people up, open their eyes for their own good. With the Beatles on iTunes now we can only expect them to be more ubiquitous than ever. Of course, there are good ways, and jerk off ways of calling attention to the issue. Vulture’s pointers on How to Hate the Beatles, leans safely to the former. I recommend it. Here’s excerpts from the first three:

1. Make sure you like something interesting.
As soon as you’ve announced that you hate the Beatles, the first question on some people’s minds will be what the hell you think is so much better, then, big shot…..

2. Pick the right Beatles song to begrudgingly enjoy.
The Beatles released many songs of many types, and you will be called upon to confess that there is at least one you enjoy. You should do this: It’s an issue of good faith. Just be sure that the one song you enjoy doesn’t explain your taste too well. For instance, if you only enjoy heavy music, don’t say that “Helter Skelter” is okay. It’ll be much more fascinating if you listen to nothing but Satan-obsessed thrash metal but enjoy the song “Piggies”…

3. Use the Beatles against themselves. The Beatles thought loads of different musicians were interesting, and sometimes it’s fun to tell Beatles fans you agree. Some of the options are obvious, like saying you enjoy the American music the Beatles were inspired by — Chuck Berry, Little Richard, Eddie Cochran, etc. But how about the highbrow stuff the band got into later on, like German composer Karlheinz Stockhausen, or Yoko Ono’s Fluxus art scene? John Lennon thought Ono was really cool, and there’s nothing more pleasant than telling Beatles fans you concur. Recommend the six-CD Onobox, just so you can explain to people how childish their laughter is.

I find that one of the most effective things to do is slip some Kink’s into the rotation, and not the clear channel approved radio hits, but stuff a lot people aren’t that familiar with like “Dead End Street,” or “Victoria.” They’ll think it’s an old Beatles song they’ve never heard before and start raving and you’ll have them. Then you can admit that the Beatles are treasure, it’s just important to know why, and you can let it be. Read the full pointers list here.


Hacked In

Funny or Die Is Taking Over

FOD TV comes to IFC every Saturday night.

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We’ve been fans of Funny or Die since we first met The Landlord. That enduring love makes it more than logical, then, that IFC is totally cool with FOD hijacking the airwaves every Saturday night. Yes, that’s happening.

The appropriately titled FOD TV looks like something pulled from public access television in the nineties. Like lo-fi broken-antenna reception and warped VHS tapes. Equal parts WTF and UHF.

Get ready for characters including The Shirtless Painter, Long-Haired Businessmen, and Pigeon Man. They’re aptly named, but for a better sense of what’s in store, here’s a taste of ASMR with Kelly Whispers:

Watch FOD TV every Saturday night during IFC’s regularly scheduled movies.


Wicked Good

See More Evil

Stan Against Evil Season 1 is on Hulu.

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GIFs via Giphy

Okay, so you missed the entire first season of Stan Against Evil. There’s no shame in that, per se. But here’s the thing: Season 2 is just around the corner and you don’t want to lag behind. After all, Season 1 had some critical character development, not to mention countless plot twists, and a breathless finale cliffhanger that’s been begging for resolution since last fall. It also had this:


The good news is that you can catch up right now on Hulu. Phew. But if you aren’t streaming yet, here’s a basic primer…

Willards Mill Is Evil

Stan spent his whole career as sheriff oblivious to the fact that his town has a nasty curse. Mostly because his recently-deceased wife was secretly killing demons and keeping Stan alive.

Demons Really Want To Kill Stan

The curse on Willards Mill stipulates that damned souls must hunt and kill each and every town sheriff, or “constable.” Oh, and these demons are shockingly creative.


They Also Want To Kill Evie

Why? Because Evie’s a sheriff too, and the curse on Willard’s Mill doesn’t have a “one at a time” clause. Bummer, Evie.

Stan and Evie Must Work Together

Beating the curse will take two, baby, but that’s easier said than done because Stan doesn’t always seem to give a damn. Damn!


Beware of Goats

It goes without saying for anyone who’s seen the show: If you know that ancient evil wants to kill you, be wary of anything that has cloven feet.


Season 2 Is Lurking

Scary new things are slouching towards Willards Mill. An impending darkness descending on Stan, Evie and their cohort – eviler evil, more demony demons, and whatnot. And if Stan wants to survive, he’ll have to get even Stanlier.

Stan Against Evil Season 1 is now streaming right now on Hulu.



Reminders that the ’90s were a thing

"The Place We Live" is available for a Jessie Spano-level binge on Comedy Crib.

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GIFs via Giphy

Unless you stopped paying attention to the world at large in 1989, you are of course aware that the ’90s are having their pop cultural second coming. Nobody is more acutely aware of this than Dara Katz and Betsy Kenney, two comedians who met doing improv comedy and have just made their Comedy Crib debut with the hilarious ’90s TV throwback series, The Place We Live.

IFC: How would you describe “The Place We Live” to a fancy network executive you just met in an elevator?

Dara: It’s everything you loved–or loved to hate—from Melrose Place and 90210 but condensed to five minutes, funny (on purpose) and totally absurd.

IFC: How would you describe “The Place We Live” to a drunk friend of a friend you met in a bar?

Betsy: “Hey Todd, why don’t you have a sip of water. Also, I think you’ll love The Place We Live because everyone has issues…just like you, Todd.”


IFC: When you were living through the ’90s, did you think it was television’s golden age or the pop culture apocalypse?

Betsy: I wasn’t sure I knew what it was, I just knew I loved it!

Dara: Same. Was just happy that my parents let me watch. But looking back, the ’90s honored The Teen. And for that, it’s the golden age of pop culture. 

IFC: Which ’90s shows did you mine for the series, and why?

Betsy: Melrose and 90210 for the most part. If you watch an episode of either of those shows you’ll see they’re a comedic gold mine. In one single episode, they cover serious crimes, drug problems, sex and working in a law firm and/or gallery, all while being young, hot and skinny.

Dara: And almost any series we were watching in the ’90s, Full House, Saved By the Bell, My So Called Life has very similar themes, archetypes and really stupid-intense drama. We took from a lot of places. 


IFC: How would you describe each of the show’s characters in terms of their ’90s TV stereotype?

Dara: Autumn (Sunita Mani) is the femme fatale. Robin (Dara Katz) is the book worm (because she wears glasses). Candace (Betsy Kenney) is Corey’s twin and gives great advice and has really great hair. Corey (Casey Jost) is the boy next door/popular guy. Candace and Corey’s parents decided to live in a car so the gang can live in their house. 
Lee (Jonathan Braylock) is the jock.

IFC: Why do you think the world is ready for this series?

Dara: Because everyone’s feeling major ’90s nostalgia right now, and this is that, on steroids while also being a totally new, silly thing.

Delight in the whole season of The Place We Live right now on IFC’s Comedy Crib. It’ll take you back in all the right ways.