DID YOU READ

All that snobbery allows.

All that snobbery allows. (photo)

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The “emperor’s new clothes” argument has always been a remarkably unsatisfying one, a smug fable invoked by anyone angry with any given politician or acclaimed film they happen not to like. The beauty of it is that it can be applied to anyone or anything — all you need is some kind of consensus to rail against. Case in point: Jeffrey Wells’ diatribe against Douglas Sirk, which unleashed the angry passions of Glenn Kenny and is sure to keep fur flying on both comments boards all day. I’m with Team Kenny on this one — the movie Wells calls out, “Imitation of Life,” happens to be one of my favorites — but the specifics aren’t my point here.

Sirk, best known for his ’50s melodramas like “All That Heaven Allows,” wasn’t considered particularly important until a retrospective at 1972’s Edinburgh Film Festival brought him into academia. “Far From Heaven” briefly made the wider world care (or not), but he’s always been a loaded gun, and arguments over Sirk’s greatness are periodically resurrected as an anti-snob thing. See Wells, who writes:

The dweebs are playing an old snob game. They’re basically saying that you have to be a serious cineaste to recognize Sirk’s genius, and that if you don’t recognize it then you need to think things through because you’re just not as perceptive as you need to be. There’s no winning against this mindset, which is somewhere between a schoolyard bully move and an intellectual con.

02232010_colossalyouth.jpgThis inspires a vision of the world where Sirk fans are wildly powerful (ha) and where everyone’s nervously burnishing their cinephile bona fides at all times, less concerned with their own reaction than how they should react. It’s the kind of bad-faith arguing that can be applied to virtually any filmmaker you dislike (unless it’s, you know, Michael Bay).

If you’re the kind of person who cares a lot about film, then you’re probably going to end up measuring your reaction to what you see against whatever consensus you’ve gathered is out there. And, inevitably, no matter what kind of critics, journalists, bloggers you find yourself in tune with, there will always come a time when you’re staring at something in disbelief, wondering why in the world anyone takes it seriously. (For me, that’d be Pedro Costa’s “Colossal Youth.” Or most Pedro Almodóvar movies.)

You know what you don’t do then? Decide that everyone’s trying to put one over on you, start frothing at the mouth and repeating “emperor’s new clothes” while feeling very incisive.

[Photos: “Imitation of Life,” Universal, 1959; “Colossal Youth,” Criterion Collection, 2006]

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Inauguration Alternative

Bill Murray On Repeat

It's a movie "Murray-thon" all-day Friday on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection, GIFs courtesy of GIPHY

Democrats, Republicans and Millennials agree: 2017 is shaping up to be a spectacle — a spectacle that really kicks into high gear this Friday with the presidential inauguration. Not only will the new POTUS swear in, but all the Country’s highest offices will be filled. It’s a daunting prospect, and to feel a little anxious about it is only normal. But if your anxiety is snowballing into panic, we have a solution:
Bill Murray.

He’s the human embodiment of a mental “Happy Place”, and there’s really no problem he can’t solve. So, with that in mind, how about we all set aside reality for a moment and let Bill take the pain away by imagining a top-shelf White House cabinet filled exclusively by his signature characters. Here are a few hypothetical appointments for your consideration…

Secretary of Defense:
Bill Murray from Stripes

His incompetence is balanced by charm, and dumb luck is inexplicably on his side. America could do worse.

Secretary of State:
Bill Murray from Lost In Translation

A seasoned globetrotter steeped in regional traditions who has the respect of the whole wide world. And he kills Costello in karaoke, which is very important.

Press Secretary:
Bill Murray from Ghostbusters

“Cats and dogs, living together. Mass hysteria.” Dude knows how to brief a room.

Secretary of Health and Human Services:
Bill Murray from What About Bob.

A doctor-approved people person who knows that progress is measured in baby steps.

Secretary of Energy:
Bill Murray from Groundhog Day

Let’s be honest, this world is going to need a lot of do-overs.

Feeling better? Hold on to that bliss. And enjoy a healthy alternative to the inauguration brouhaha with multiple Murrays all Friday long in an IFC movie marathon including Kingpin, Zombieland, Ghostbusters, and Ghostbusters II.

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Home Run

Hank Azaria Gets Thrown A Curve Ball

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P

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Photo Credit: Everett Collection

Unless you’ve somehow missed every episode of the Simpsons since 1989, then surely you know that Hank Azaria is one of the most important character actors of our time. He’s so prolific and his voice is so dynamic that he’s responsible for more iconic personalities than most folks realize. Basically, he’s the great and powerful Oz — except that when you pull back the curtain the truth is actually more impressive. And now Hank is coming to IFC to bring yet another character to the TV pop culture hive mind in the new series Brockmire. Check out the trailer below.

Based on the following Funny or Die short and co-starring Amanda Peet, Brockmire follows the story of imploded major league sportscaster Jim Brockmire as he tries to resurrect his career by calling plays for a floundering minor league team in a podunk town.

The series is written by Joel Church-Cooper (Undateable) and produced by Funny or Die’s Mike Farah and Joe Farrell, meaning that there’s funny in front of the camera, funny behind the camera–funny all around. Sounds like a ball to us.

Brockmire premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Car Notes

Portlandia On People Who Can’t Park

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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If flagrant bad parking takes nerve, then retaliatory note writing takes neuroses. Watch Fred and Carrie take passive aggression to next level in Car Notes, the new Portlandia web series presented by Subaru. The first episode is yours right here and now, and you can see every installment of Car Notes anytime online, on the IFC app and on demand.

Portlandia returns tonight at 10P on IFC.

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