DID YOU READ

Highlights from Michael Madsen’s magical 2009.

Highlights from Michael Madsen’s magical 2009. (photo)

Posted by on

There’s a hilarious account in the Guardian of everything went wrong during the shooting of “The Big I Am,” an upcoming British gangster drama.

The best parts involve one of its big name stars, Michael Madsen, who arrived “insisting all costume department mannequins be turned to the wall lest he be spooked by the wigs,” then refused to do his big death scene properly. Instead, he “made up a poem… about the nature of true love,” sang “Green, Green Grass of Home” on the next take, and on the final take screamed into the camera “Am I fucking dead enough for you now?”

Ever wonder what happened to Madsen since his critically acclaimed comeback turn in the “Kill Bill”? Well, a man can’t collect too many paychecks, especially if he’s not picky about where the funds are coming from — IMDb lists a staggering 18 credits from this year alone. Here are seven of my favorites from Madsen’s 2009.

12092009_lostinthewoods4.jpg“Lost In The Woods”
Michael Madsen is… Stuart Bunka
Tagline: “Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Go Back In The Forest!”
Plot: Seemingly inspired by Barry Levinson’s 1992 flop “Toys,” this family film stars Madsen as the self-proclaimed “greatest toymaker in the world.” His key invention: “The Facilitator,” which apparently includes miniature grenade launchers and little UFOs that place exploding cigars in the mouths of your opponents. When his daughter is kidnapped and the criminals demand two million dollars for her release, some kids wage war against the “Home Alone”-dumb criminals, presumably using Bunka toys. Also, laxatives lead a kidnapper looking for relief to get bit in the ass by a snake. And they put fireworks in the bad guy’s pants.
Key Madsen Line: “No matter who your enemies are or what the odds against you, with the Facilitator you’re gonna win or I’m not Stuart Bunka. Bunka Toys.”

12092009_mightaswelllive4.jpg“You Might As Well Live”
Michael Madsen is… Clinton Manitoba
Tagline: “Robert Mutt is not a douche bag.”
Plot: Robert Mutt (Joshua Peace) has tried to kill himself multiple times and leaves the mental asylum after beating his doctor at air hockey. The community thinks he’s a pedophile and loser, so he sets out to prove himself with help from his hallucinated friend, Clinton Manitoba, former farm-league baseball great. A Canadian comedy that was well-reviewed in Canada, this one seems to drink heavily from the “Napoleon Dynamite” well.
Key Madsen Line: “Fuck the internet.” Response: “Right in the face.”

12092009_thekillingjar4.jpg“The Killing Jar”
Michael Madsen is… Doe
Tagline: N/A
Plot: Sheriff, ominously: “There’s been some murders over in Union County.” Waitress: “What kind of person kills a child?” Enter Madsen, who takes the diner’s occupants hostage and begins getting some seriously violent action going, shooting folks point blank with deer-killing-caliber bullets. His hostages, incidentally, include some serious direct-to-video bait: Danny Trejo (who deserves better) and Jake “son of Gary” Busey (who doesn’t). This is one of like 30 movies starring Madsen as a raspy-voiced psychopath, and certainly not the last on this list; it’s what he does best.
Key Madsen Line: “You’ve got to separate the wheat from the chaff.”

12092009_theportal4.jpg“The Portal”
Michael Madsen is… Dr. Azirra
Tagline: “Dare to face your inner child…”
Plot: A super-evil painting isn’t just bad abstract art but the portal to another world, where couples make out against floaty blue-screened cosmoses and from which emerge spooky, flaxen-haired children who giggle innocently before turning into cheap-looking, gray-skinned demons. This generic horror trailer could pass for just another J-horror rip-off until the minute mark, at which point screaming zombie types emerge, blood flows down toilet-stall walls and amputations ensue. It’s kind of unbelievable how much blood is just casually flowing around; this is worth a NSFW look. Madsen seems to be playing the skeptical doctor investigating.
Key Madsen Line: “A portal. You really expect me to believe that?”

12092009_outrage4.jpg“Outrage”
Michael Madsen is… Farragute
Tagline: N/A
Plot: A Christian woman and her puddle-jumper plane either crash or are taken down (unclear) by a group of redneck hillbillies (including one deliberately Ted Kaczynski-looking dude) who proceed to get all “The Most Dangerous Game” on them, chasing them through the woods. Madsen isn’t the centerpiece here — that would be the part of the trailer where a dude’s struck by lightening, then there’s a shot of his soul exiting his body. Also, everyone runs around on glorified sit-down lawnmowers, someone gets chopped up by a plane propeller and someone else loses a foot to a bear-trap. Co-starring Natasha Lyonne.
Key Madsen Line: “In this life, you’re either the hunter or the hunted.”

12092009_brazelbull4.jpg“The Brazen Bull”
Michael Madsen is… “The Man”
Tagline: N/A
Plot: You know you’re in good hands from the trailer’s second shot, of Madsen walking up to the camera, cigarette in hand, with someone strapped-down to a rather-unpleasant-looking surgical table in the background. In this slasher-type movie (which Madsen saw fit to produce), folks checking out a property for development quickly realize there’s something wrong (“This wasn’t locked when we came in!”). Yeah it is — for whatever reason, Madsen wants to capture everyone and torture them while lighting his smokes with a blowtorch. Fair enough.
Key Madsen Line: “Pain. Is truth.”

12092009_thebleeding4.jpg“The Bleeding”
Michael Madsen is… Father Roy
Tagline: N/A
Plot: Somehing about evil vampires who want to destroy the world; Shawn Black (Matthew Matthias) isn’t going to let that happen. Getting his spiritual/tactical back is Madsen as the kind of priest who seems a bit more fixated on firearms and booze than your average clergymen. Co-stars: Vinnie Jones, Armand Assante, DMX, Kat von D.
Key Madsen Line: “What I do think [takes a sip of beer] is that you’re the kind of guy who only shows up when the shit’s about to hit the fan.”

[Top photo: Madsen in “Kill Bill: Vol. 2,” Miramax, 2004]

Soap tv show

As the Spoof Turns

15 Hilarious Soap Opera Parodies

Catch the classic sitcom Soap Saturday mornings on IFC.

Posted by on
Photo Credit: Columbia Pictures Television

The soap opera is the indestructible core of television fandom. We celebrate modern series like The Wire and Breaking Bad with their ongoing storylines, but soap operas have been tangling more plot threads than a quilt for decades. Which is why pop culture enjoys parodying them so much.

Check out some of the funniest soap opera parodies below, and be sure to catch Soap Saturday mornings on IFC.

1. Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman

maryhartman

Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman was a cult hit soap parody from the mind of Norman Lear that poked daily fun at the genre with epic twists and WTF moments. The first season culminated in a perfect satire of ratings stunts, with Mary being both confined to a psychiatric facility and chosen to be part of a Nielsen ratings family.


2. IKEA Heights

ikea heights

IKEA Heights proves that the soap opera is alive and well, even if it has to be filmed undercover at a ready-to-assemble furniture store totally unaware of what’s happening. This unique webseries brought the classic formula to a new medium. Even IKEA saw the funny side — but has asked that future filmmakers apply through proper channels.


3. Fresno

fresno

When you’re parodying ’80s nighttime soaps like Dallas and Dynasty , everything about your show has to equally sumptuous. The 1986 CBS miniseries Fresno delivered with a high-powered cast (Carol Burnett, Teri Garr and more in haute couture clothes!) locked in the struggle for the survival of a raisin cartel.


4. Soap

soap

Soap was the nighttime response to daytime soap operas: a primetime skewering of everything both silly and satisfying about the source material. Plots including demonic possession and alien abduction made it a cult favorite, and necessitated the first televised “viewer discretion” disclaimer. It also broke ground for featuring one of the first gay characters on television in the form of Billy Crystal’s Jodie Dallas. Revisit (or discover for the first time) this classic sitcom every Saturday morning on IFC.


5. Too Many Cooks

cooks2

Possibly the most perfect viral video ever made, Too Many Cooks distilled almost every style of television in a single intro sequence. The soap opera elements are maybe the most hilarious, with more characters and sudden shocking twists in an intro than most TV scribes manage in an entire season.


6. Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace

darkplace

Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace was more mockery than any one medium could handle. The endless complications of Darkplace Hospital are presented as an ongoing horror soap opera with behind-the-scenes anecdotes from writer, director, star, and self-described “dreamweaver visionary” Garth Marenghi and astoundingly incompetent actor/producer Dean Learner.


7. “Attitudes and Feelings, Both Desirable and Sometimes Secretive,” MadTV

attitudes

Soap opera connoisseurs know that the most melodramatic plots are found in Korea. MADtv‘s parody Tae Do  (translation: Attitudes and Feelings, Both Desirable and Sometimes Secretive) features the struggles of mild-mannered characters with far more feelings than their souls, or subtitles, could ever cope with.


8. Twin Peaks

peaks

Twin Peaks, the twisted parody of small town soaps like Peyton Place whose own creator repeatedly insists is not a parody, has endured through pop culture since it changed television forever when it debuted in 1990. The show even had it’s own soap within in a soap called…


9. “Invitation to Love,” Twin Peaks

invitation

Twin Peaks didn’t just parody soap operas — it parodied itself parodying soap operas with the in-universe show Invitation to Love. That’s more layers of deceit and drama than most televised love triangles.


10. “As The Stomach Turns,” The Carol Burnett Show

stomach

The Carol Burnett Show poked fun at soaps with this enduring take on As The World Turns. In a case of life imitating art, one story involving demonic possession would go on to happen for “real” on Days of Our Lives.


11. Days of our Lives (Friends Edition)

joey

Still airing today, Days of Our Lives is one of the most famous soap operas of all time. They’re also excellent sports, as they allowed Friends star Joey Tribbiani to star as Dr Drake Ramoray, the only doctor to date his own stalker (while pretending to be his own evil twin). And then return after a brain-transplant.

And let’s not forget the greatest soap opera parody line ever written: “Come on Joey, you’re going up against a guy who survived his own cremation!”


12. Acorn Antiques

acorn

First appearing on the BBC sketch comedy series Victoria Wood As Seen on TV, Acorn Antiques combines almost every low-budget soap opera trope into one amazing whole. The staff of a small town antique store suffer a disproportional number of amnesiac love-triangles, while entire storylines suddenly appear and disappear without warning or resolution. Acorn Antiques was so popular, it went on to become a hit West End musical.


13. “Point Place,” That 70s Show

pointplace

In a memorable That ’70s Show episode, an unemployed Red is reduced to watching soaps all day. He becomes obsessed despite the usual Red common-sense objections (like complaining that it’s impossible to fall in love with someone in a coma). His dreams render his own life as Point Place, a melodramatic nightmare where Kitty leaves him because he’s unemployed. (Click here to see all airings of That ’70s Show on IFC.)


14. The Spoils of Babylon

spoils

Bursting from the minds of Will Ferrell and creators Andrew Steele and Matt Piedmont, The Spoils of Babylon was a spectacular parody of soap operas and epic mini-series like The Thorn Birds. Taking the parody even further, Ferrell himself played Eric Jonrosh, the author of the book on which the series was based. Jonrosh returned in The Spoils Before Dying, a jazzy murder mystery with its own share of soapy twists and turns.

spoilsdying


15. All My Children Finale, SNL

allmychildren

SNL‘s final celebration of one of the biggest soaps of all time is interrupted by a relentless series of revelations from stage managers, lighting designers, make-up artists, and more. All of whom seem to have been married to or murdered by (or both) each other.

Seth Meyers Making a Talk Show Host

Making Seth

Seth Meyers Tackles True Crime Again With Making a Murderer Spoof

Watch full episodes of Documentary Now! right now on IFC.com.

Posted by on
Photo Credit: NBC

Seth Meyers knows a thing or two about true crime parodies. The Late Night host, along with comedy cohorts Bill Hader and Fred Armisen, co-produced Documentary Now! which painstakingly recreates the look and feel of some of our most memorable real-life dramas. Following the show’s fantastic take on Errol Morris’ groundbreaking true crime documentary The Thin Blue Line, Meyers took aim this week at another suspicious police force. Returning from a holiday break, the host opened his show with a parody of Netflix’s buzzy series Making a Murderer with his own version, “Making a Talk Show Host.”

Take a gander at the clip below. (Don’t worry– it’s nowhere near as soul-crushingly depressing as its source material.) And for more Documentary Now!, be sure to check out exclusive video that offers an in-depth look at the craft behind the show, music from the showfull episodes and more.

Weird Al in Milo Murphy’s Law

News of the Weird

“Weird Al” Yankovic to Get Animated In New Disney XD Series

"Weird Al" debuts as Comedy Bang! Bang!'s new bandleader this spring on IFC.

Posted by on
Photo Credit: IFC/Disney XD

It’s hard to imagine Comedy Bang! Bang!’s newest bandleader any more animated than he already is, but “Weird Al” Yankovic will soon loosen the shackles of the physical world and become a cartoon. The parody singer has been cast to voice the lead character in Disney XD’s upcoming animated series Milo Murphy’s Law, the new show from the creators of Phineas and Ferb. 

As Milo, “Weird Al” plays an accident-prone jinx who suffers from “Extreme Hereditary Murphy’s Law Condition.” True to the age-old saying, everything that can go wrong for poor Milo does in hilarious fashion. And Al’s dulcet tones won’t be sacrificed either: Milo will occasionally bust out a tune throughout the show and Yankovic will also compose the intro’s theme song.

Of course, “Weird Al” is no stranger to the animated realm. Check out his 3D-rendered ’80s form in UHF’s parody of Dire Straits’ “Money for Nothing.” And check back for more updates about Al’s debut as Comedy Bang! Bang!‘s new bandleader and musical cohost.

Powered by ZergNet