“Taking Woodstock” Offers Nothing New

“Taking Woodstock” Offers Nothing New (photo)

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Apparently determined to tackle every cinematic genre known to man, Ang Lee has thus far given us his take on the popular-lit adaptation (“Eat Drink Man Woman”), the classic-lit adaptation (“Sense and Sensibility”), the Civil War western (“Ride With the Devil”), the wuxia action flick (“Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon”), the Marvel comic-book summer tentpole (“Hulk”), the WWII espionage thriller (“Lust, Caution”) and, of course, the gay cowboy weepie (“Brokeback Mountain”).

It was inevitable, I suppose, that he would eventually get around to the historical docudrama — or, as I’ve recently dubbed that generally useless collection of bullet-point factoids, the Wiki-movie. Technically, “Taking Woodstock” was adapted from key organizer Elliot Tiber’s memoir of the same title; with the exception of some laborious anecdotes involving Tiber’s Russian immigrant parents, however, you can find pretty much every detail of the movie in Wikipedia’s tidy entry on the fabled concert, assuming that you don’t know most of that stuff already. If this film winds up being all that remains after a nuclear holocaust, it’ll be a valuable document. Otherwise, zzz.

A big part of the problem is that Tiber, played here by “Daily Show” correspondent Demetri Martin, didn’t really do much of anything — certainly nothing that required extensive dramatization. He was a civic-minded young music lover who, when he heard that a proposed extravaganza featuring many of his favorite bands was on the verge of being canceled for lack of a venue, used his position on the Bethel, NY city council to wrangle the necessary permit, originally intended for a concert of chamber music. He also put the promoters in touch with nearby dairy farmer Max Yasgur (Eugene Levy), who rented out 600 acres for the event. Tiber’s family ran a cruddy little motel, which the Woodstock staff booked in toto; Tiber therefore had to run around changing the sheets and creating smaller mini-rooms (using dividers) to handle the overflow.

Sound scintillating? If it’s a recreation of Woodstock itself you seek, forget it — like Tiber, we see the stage only from a faraway hilltop, at a distance so great that the music isn’t even audible. And there just isn’t anything even marginally interesting about the behind-the-scenes machinations of one two-bit hustler. Martin plays Tiber as an amiable nebbish, practically devoid of personality; it barely registers when he comes out of the closet towards the end of the movie, inspired by the liberation he sees all around him, as the character hadn’t been anything more than a generic plot motor prior to this emotional epiphany. To keep the film from flatlining, Lee and his regular screenwriter, James Schamus, are forced to resort to goofy, mostly unfunny comedy, courtesy of Imelda Staunton as Tiber’s outrageously greedy/stingy mom and Liev Schreiber as a hulking transvestite with a pistol strapped to his upper thigh, who volunteers to be head of security.

08252009_TakingWoodstock2.jpgMostly, though, the experience of watching “Taking Woodstock” — at least for anyone not recently attached to a placenta — amounts to ticking off items from a checklist of “well, duh” expectations. You sit there waiting for the roads into Bethel to be jammed by barefoot hippies, for heavy rains to turn Yasgur’s field into a giant mud pit and, inevitably, for Lee to employ the same split-screen effect that Martin Scorsese and Thelma Schoonmaker used when editing Michael Wadleigh’s documentary “Woodstock.”

It’s the kind of movie in which you know the acid just kicked in because the background suddenly goes all smeary-psychedelic; the kind of movie in which you’re prompted to chortle with retroactive knowingness at a promoter’s assurance that an upcoming Rolling Stones show will surely be a nonstop groovy lovefest. (Get it? Altamont!) It’s Ang Lee’s lamest movie ever, but at least he has it out of the way now. Bring on the musical.


Benders Tonight

5 Ways to Get Ready For Tonight’s All-New Benders

Catch Benders tonight at 10P on IFC

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Thank Chubbys it’s Thursday! Follow these tips for preparing for tonight’s brand new Benders if you want to end the week in style.

1. Throw a Chickenpox Party.

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Beer helps cure chicken pox, right?

2. Get Your Flu Shot.

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Just a friendly reminder that it’s cold and flu season. You don’t want to empty the contents of your stomach during your next game of floor hockey like poor Sebalos. Serious party foul, bro.

3. Recruit Some Friends

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Get your friends on Team Uncle Chubbys with this recruitment video.

4. Practice the “What up, bro?” Move.

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Your bros will never know what hit them.

5. Prepare for The Force to Awaken in You.


There is no try when it comes to chugging beer. Do like the Benders or do not.


David Cross in NYC

David Cross Is Coming to NYC’s Live Employee Of The Month Podcast

Todd Margaret returns Jan 7th at 10P on IFC.

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No one would ever accuse Todd Margaret of being a good employee. After being assigned to the London office of Thunder Muscle, he ended up blowing up the entire world. It’s safe to assume that Todd Margaret isn’t going to get a raise after those shenanigans, but David Cross, who plays Todd in the series, just got named Employee of the Month.

The comedian is appearing at the live talk show event on November 20th at NYC’s Joe’s Pub which will be recorded for an accompanying weekly podcast. Cross will be subjecting himself to host Catie Lazarus‘ trademark unorthodox line of questioning about how he created such an awesome career, including With Bob and David, Arrested Development, Todd Margaret and so much more.

David will be appearing alongside Speedy Ortiz frontwoman Sadie Dupuis and actress Greta Gerwig (Frances Ha, Mistress America) who finally managed to escape from Portlandia‘s Women & Women First bookstore.

Get tickets here. and be sure to catch the return of a very, very different Todd when the third season of Todd Margaret premieres January 7th at 10P ET/PT on IFC. Check out the trailer for more.

What’s Employee of the Month? Watch the video below. 

Amy Poehler Carrie Brownstein

Carrie and Amy Team Up

Watch Carrie Brownstein Officiate a Wedding With Amy Poehler’s Help

Carrie Brownstein's Hunger Makes Me a Modern Girl is available now.

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Here’s proof that anything can happen when you go to one of Carrie Brownstein’s book readings: a recent stopover on Carrie’s Hunger Makes Me A Modern Girl book tour turned into an impromptu wedding ceremony.

Amy Poehler had just wrapped up her Q&A with Carrie when a couple asked the Portlandia star — who just so happens to be an ordained minister — if she would officiate their wedding. “Amy was visibly excited and shocked, and turned to Carrie [and said] ‘You gotta do it!’,” said a source speaking to Us Weekly

According to an audience member, “[The couple] asked if they could get married on the spot, as they’d come prepared with their marriage license.”

“It was a sincere, thoughtful, and impressive speech, considering the spontaneity,” added sources. “Amy remained seated at the piano, looking emotional and delighted for them…”

Be sure to grab Hunger Makes Me a Modern Girl out now, and catch Carrie on her book tour. Who knows what will happen next???

The Fan Everett Collection

It's Not Crazy, It's Sports

8 Extreme Sports Fans from the Movies

Cheer on Uncle Chubbys on an all-new Benders Thursday at 10P on IFC.

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There have been countless movies about sports heroes over the years. But every so often those of us whose court is on the couch regretting how many chicken wings we ate on game day get the spotlight. The Benders guys love hockey, but these passionate sports fans from the movies take their team loyalty to some pretty extreme places.

8. Kevin Costner, Field of Dreams

Ray Kinsella (Costner) is such a fan of baseball, he listens to voices in his head and builds a field in his backyard. Thankfully they never made a sequel called “Field of Screams” where the voices tell Ray to murder his family.

7. Dan Aykroyd and Daniel Stern, Celtic Pride

Aykroyd and Stern play Boston fans who kidnap an opposing team’s player in this Judd Apatow scripted comedy. Much like Tom Brady, they never admit to their crime.

6. Robert De Niro, The Fan

Gil Renard (De Niro) loved the San Francisco Giants so much, he actually kidnapped player Bobby Rayburn’s (Wesley Snipes) son. Couldn’t he have just painted his body orange and black and called it a day?

5. The Fans in Major League

The fans stayed dedicated to the Indians even in tough times, which is pretty admirable since the team consisted of a womanizer, an ex-con and a voodoo practitioner.

4. Patton Oswalt, Big Fan

Patton Oswalt is borderline mental in his NY Giants fandom here, which, if you look at their offense this year, you’d have to be.

3. Robert De Niro (again), Silver Linings Playbook

Silver Linings Playbook

De Niro’s character has lost it all betting on the Eagles over the years. Nobody tell him about Draft Kings, okay?

2. Toro the Bull, Space Jam

It’s not tough to root for a team consisting of Michael Jordan, Bugs Bunny AND Bill Murray, but Toro didn’t just cheer from the sidelines. When push came to shove, he put his horns where the Monstars’ sun don’t shine, and helped turn the tide of the game.

1. Susan Sarandon, Bull Durham

Talk about going the extra mile. Mentor, lover and fan, Annie Savoy (Sarandon) is second only to the jock strap as the ultimate athletic supporter.

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