Before he died, Michael Jackson’s sad childhood was often neglected by media reports that favored focusing on what a weirdo he was. But Jackson’s troubled childhood made him who he was and drove all those kid-centric movies, charities, and Neverland Ranch fun times. Rather than incriminating, his history seems to validate his good intentions, however ill-conceived. Further case in point, the King of Pop had recently “committed to co-direct and fund” a drama about foster children, tentatively called “They Cage the Animals at Night” [NYDailyNews]
If you’ve never seen “Louis, Martin & Michael,” a Louis Theroux documentary about his quest to interview Michael Jackson, google it. Louis is brilliantly awkward whether you’re interested in the crazies he interviews or not. This one stands out with a frightening Joe Jackson interview where he callously admits to whipping a young Michael. Louis also talks with Michael’s friend Uri Geller, a ginormous trip artist.
Geller’s cashing in on lots of private footage and a doc with the lamest title ever: “My Friend Michael Jackson: Uri’s Story.” From the Guardian report, so far it sounds like a feature about the two on a shopping spree at Harrods, and some misty, water-colored snippets of Uri’s wedding with best man Michael Jackson. God what I wouldn’t give to have Michael at my wedding, right?
It’s close to midnight and something evil’s lurking in the dark. Sony Pictures is acquiring the rehearsal footage and prearranged video accompaniments for Michael’s now defunct This Is It tour for something like $60 million and making a film out of it. It might be in 3-d. It’s slated for an October 30th release [Variety]. Girl, you know it’s thriller, thriller night.
Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.
Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.
Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk
Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.
Lane 33: Twins
You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.
Lane 27: Broken Windows
Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.
Lane 69: Filthy Cars
You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.
Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles
It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.
Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.
It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:
Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.
Breakfast In Bed
Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.
You’ll need them to get through the holidays.
So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).
With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.
Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…
Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.
Put A Bird On It
Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.
Colin the Chicken
Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.
Dream Of The ’90s
This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.
No You Go
We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.
We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.
One More Episode
The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.
Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.