DID YOU READ

The Black Lips Booted From India

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Last Saturday The Black Lips were booked to play on an American Idol-type program in India called Campus Rock Idol. During their performance they managed to shock a national television audience by mooning the crowd and engaging in some dude-on-dude lip kissing action. Guitarist, Cole Alexander, pushed the envelope even further by dropping his draws while attempting to play his guitar with his penis.

(left: The Black Lips’ TV appearance was NOT a feel-good-story like Slumdog Millionaire.)

The antics led to an international uproar, causing sponsors to pull out of the program which was cancelled altogether.

Needless to say, in a stunt that wouldn’t fly in America, The Black Lips were chased out of India. Here’s what the band’s managed offered up in a press release yesterday:

Considering the wealth of information–some accurate, some not so much–that washed up on American shores after the event, it’s fortunate that VBS.tv cameras were there to document what transpired.

Over the coming weeks, VBS will be running a series entitled “The Black Lips in India,” which faithfully documents the band’s turbulent experience before and after the Chennai gig, their escape to King Khan’s pad in Berlin, and beyond.

Trailer for The Black Lips In India.

Letter Cole Alexander Sent After The Escape.

Vice Interview With Drummer Joe Bradley.

Underworld

Under Your Spell

10 Otherworldly Romances That’ll Melt Your Heart

Spend Valentine's Day weekend with IFC's Underworld movie marathon.

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Photo Credit: Screen Gems/courtesy Everett Collection

Romance takes many forms, and that is especially true when you have a thirst for blood or laser beams coming out of your eyes.  It doesn’t matter if you’re a werewolf, a superhero, a clone, a time-traveler, or a vampire, love is the one thing that infects us all.  Read on to find out why Romeo and Juliet have nothing on these supernatural star-crossed lovers, and be sure to catch IFC’s Underworld movie marathon this Valentine’s Day weekend.

1. Cyclops/Jean Grey/Wolverine, X-Men series

The X-Men franchise is rife with romance, but the steamiest “ménage à mutant” may just be the one between Jean Grey (Famke Janssen), Cyclops (James Marsden), and Wolverine (Hugh Jackman). Their triangle is a complicated one as Jean finds herself torn between the two very different men while also trying to control her darker side, the Phoenix. This leads to Jean killing Cyclops and eventually getting stabbed through her heart by Wolverine in X-Men: The Last Stand. Yikes!  Maybe they should change the name to Ex-Men instead?


2. Willow/Tara, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Joss Whedon gave audiences some great romances on Buffy the Vampire Slayer — including the central triangle of Buffy, Angel, and Spike — but it was the love between witches Willow (Alyson Hannigan) and Tara (Amber Benson) that broke new ground for its sensitive and nuanced portrayal of a LGBT relationship.

Willow is smart and confident and isn’t even sure of her sexuality when she first meets Tara at college in a Wiccan campus group. As the two begin experimenting with spells, they realize they’re also falling for one another and become the show’s most enduring, happy couple. At least until Tara’s death in season six, a moment that still brings on the feels.


3. Selene/Michael, Underworld series

The Twilight gang pales in comparison (both literally and metaphorically) to the Lycans and Vampires of the stylish Underworld franchise. If you’re looking for an epic vampire/werewolf romance set amidst an epic vampire/werewolf war, Underworld handily delivers in the form of leather catsuited Selene (Kate Beckinsale) and shaggy blonde hunk Michael (a post-Felicity Scott Speedman). As they work together to stop the Vampire/Lycan war, they give into their passions while also kicking butt in skintight leather. Love at first bite indeed.


4. Spider-man/Mary Jane Watson, Spider-man

After rushing to the aid of beautiful girl-next-door Mary Jane Watson (Kirsten Dunst), the Amazing Spider-man is rewarded with an upside-down kiss that is still one of the most romantic moments in comic book movie history. For Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire), the shy, lovable dork beneath the mask, his rain-soaked makeout session is the culmination of years of unrequited love and one very powerful spider bite. As the films progress, Peter tries pushing MJ away in an attempt to protect her from his enemies, but their web of love is just too powerful. And you know, with great power, comes great responsibility.


5. Molly/Sam, Ghost

When it comes to supernatural romance, you really can’t beat Molly and Sam from the 1990 hit film Ghost. Demi Moore goes crazy for Swayze like the rest of us, and the pair make pottery sexier than it’s ever been.

When Sam is murdered, he’s forced to communicate through con artist turned real psychic, Oda Mae Brown (Whoopi Goldberg in her Academy Award-winning role) to warn Molly she is still in danger from his co-worker, Carl (a pre-Scandal Tony Goldwyn). Molly doesn’t believe Oda is telling the truth, so Sam proves it by sliding a penny up the wall and then possessing Oda so he and Molly can share one last romantic dance together (but not the dirty kind). We’d pay a penny for a dance with Patrick Swayze ANY day.


6. Cosima/Delphine, Orphan Black

It stands to reason there would be at least one complicated romance on a show about clones, and none more complicated than the one between clone Cosima (Tatiana Maslany) and Dr. Delphine Cormier (Evelyne Brochu) on BBC America’s hit drama Orphan Black.

Cosima is a PhD student focusing on evolutionary developmental biology at the University of Minnesota when she meets Delphine, a research associate from the nefarious Dyad Institute, posing as a fellow immunology student. The two fall in love, but their happiness is brief once Dyad and the other members of Clone Club get involved. Here’s hoping Cosima finds love in season four of Orphan Black. Girlfriend could use a break.


7. Aragorn/Arwen, Lord of the Rings

On a picturesque bridge in Rivendell amidst some stellar mood-lighting and dreamy Elvish language with English subtitles for us non-Middle Earthlings, Arwen (Liv Tyler) and Aragorn (Viggo Mortensen) bind their souls to one another, pledging to love each other no matter what befalls them.

Their courtship is a matter of contention with Arwen’s father, Elrond (Hugo Weaving), who doesn’t wish to see his daughter suffer over Aragorn’s future death. The two marry after the conclusion of the War of the Ring, with Aragorn assuming his throne as King of Gondor, and Arwen forgoing her immortality to become his Queen. Is it too much to assume they asked Frodo to be their wedding ring-bearer?


8. Lafayette/Jesus, True Blood

True Blood quickly became the go-to show for supernatural sex scenes featuring future Magic Mike strippers (Joe Manganiello) and pale Nordic men with washboard abs (Hi Alexander Skarsgård!), but honestly, there was a little something for everyone, including fan favorite Bon Temps medium, Lafayette Reynolds (Nelsan Ellis).

In season three, Lafayette met his mother’s nurse, Jesus, and the two began a relationship. As they spend more time together and start doing V (short for Vampire Blood), they learn Jesus is descended from a long line of witches and that Lafayette himself has magical abilities. However, supernatural love is anything but simple, and after the pair join a coven, Lafayette becomes possessed by the dead spirit of its former leader. This relationship certainly puts a whole new spin on possessive love.


9. Nymphadora Tonks/Remus Lupin, Harry Potter series

There are lots of sad characters in the Harry Potter series, but Remus Lupin ranks among the saddest. He was bitten by a werewolf as a child, his best friend was murdered and his other best friend was wrongly imprisoned in Azkaban for it, then THAT best friend was killed by a Death Eater at the Ministry of Magic as Remus looked on. So when Lupin unexpectedly found himself in love with badass Auror and Metamorphmagus Nymphadora Tonks (she prefers to be called by her surname ONLY, thank you very much), pretty much everyone, including Lupin himself, was both elated and cautiously hopeful about their romance and eventual marriage.

Sadly, the pair met a tragic ending when both were killed by Death Eaters during the Battle of Hogwarts, leaving their son, Teddy, orphaned much like his godfather Harry Potter. Accio hankies!


10. The Doctor/Rose Tyler, Doctor Who

Speaking of wolves, Rose “Bad Wolf” Tyler (Billie Piper) captured the Doctor’s hearts from the moment he told her to “Run!” in the very first episode of the re-booted Doctor Who series. Their affection for one another grew steadily deeper during their travels in the TARDIS, whether they were stuck in 1950s London, facing down pure evil in the Satan Pit, or battling Cybermen.

But their relationship took a tragic turn during the season two finale episode, “Doomsday,” when the Tenth Doctor (David Tennant) and Rose found themselves separated in parallel universes with no way of being reunited (lest two universes collapse as a result of a paradox). A sobbing Rose told a holographic transmission of the Doctor she loved him, but before he could reply, the transmission cut out, leaving our beloved Time Lord (and most of the audience) with a tear-stained face and two broken hearts all alone in the TARDIS.

Jack Ryan

Cast Off

The Best and Worst Recast Movie Roles

Catch Patriot Games this month on IFC.

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Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures

In an era of blockbuster continuity, where every movie is just a set up for the next one, and the next, and the one after that, recasting a part comes with a lot of bellyaching. With a new actor stepping in, we’re just reminded how we aren’t really in a far away galaxy, or battling aliens with The Avengers. But sometimes recasting a part is just what a franchise needs. Before you catch Patriot Games this month on IFC, check out some of the best and worst recast roles in movie history.


Best: Katie Holmes to Maggie Gyllenhal, The Batman franchise

Warner Bros. Pictures

Warner Bros. Pictures

After the Day-Glo disco nightmare that was Batman & Robin, Batman Begins was a revelation. A back-to-basics success that told us how Bruce Wayne became Gotham’s hero, Christopher Nolan’s blockbuster employed a real world approach that forever changed the superhero genre. The casting in particular was spot on, with a who’s who of acting royalty filling out the ensemble. Oh, and also Joey from Dawson’s Creek. Katie Holmes was in way over her head, trying to hold her own with Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman and Christian “Stay out of my sight-line” Bale.

Maggie Gyllenhaal

By the time The Dark Knight rolled around three years later, everyone was invited back except for the ex-wife of Operating Thetan III Tom Cruise, who was replaced with Maggie Gyllenhaal. The part was beefed up as well, now that it had a Golden Globe-winning actress behind it and not the star of First Daughter. With no weak links, The Dark Knight went on to become the gold standard of superhero movies.


Worst: Wesley Snipes to Omar Epps, Major League movies

Morgan Creek Entertainment

Morgan Creek Entertainment

There was a time, before the endless Blade sequels and tax troubles, when Wesley Snipes was as electric a movie star as you were likely to come across. He could be your leading man, or do character work. He could do probing dramas or wacky comedies. He could give you Jungle Fever or prove that White Men Can’t Jump. In the comedy classic Major League, he got to chew the scenery as Wille Mays Hayes, a faster-than-lightning ballplayer who couldn’t get a hit from a tee-ball.

Omar Epps Major League II

Morgan Creek

But when the cast was redrafted for Major League II, Snipes had become a major star, and refused to slip back into the uniform. Omar Epps, an up-and-coming star in his own right, was brought on board. And while Epps had a lot of talents, Hayes’ quick wit and flashy personality were a far cry from the grumpy doctor he would become famous playing on House M.D. He wasn’t horrible. He was just a pale copy of the original.


Worst: Anthony Michael Hall and Dana Barron to Jason Lively and Dana Hill, The Vacation movies

Warner Bros. Pictures

Warner Bros. Pictures

Anthony Michael Hall more than held his own with a prime Chevy Chase in the original Vacation, and surely would have only grown in the role if he’d returned for the sequels. But after blowing up with a string of classic ’80s comedies, his career was too hot to join the Griswolds on their European Vacation. Minus one star, this led to the odd choice of bringing actor Jason Lively on board, who would go on to appear in such classics as Maximum Force and Return to Zork. Even worse, the perfectly deadpan Dana Barron was swapped with the whiny Dana Hill in the Audrey role. Somehow the filmmakers thought we wouldn’t notice if they cast a different actor with the same first name.

Warner Bros.

Warner Bros.

Thankfully the franchise bounced back with the addition of Johnny Galecki, Ethan Embry and Juliette Lewis, who all got their turn as malcontent Griswolds. But European Vacation is still considered to be the black sheep of the Vacation films, due in no small part to Fake Rusty and Fake Audrey.


Worst: Jodie Foster to Julianne Moore, The Silence of the Lambs/Hannibal

Orion Pictures

Orion Pictures

Julianne Moore is one of the finest actresses working in film, but sometimes a part is so defined by a specific performer, no one can fill their shoes. You don’t bring in Christopher Atkins to play Luke Skywalker in The Empire Strikes Back. You don’t hire Vin Diesel to play Rocky Balboa. And you don’t replace Jodie Foster as Clarice Starling, her most iconic part.

MGM/Universal

MGM/Universal

The fact that Hannibal is a far weaker movie than Silence of the Lambs in virtually every way just exasperated the already obvious problem. Even Anthony Hopkins recently expressed regret that he revisited Dr. Lecter in the movie, so perhaps they all should have just left good enough alone.


Worst: Kathleen Cauley to Jennifer Smith to Jessie Cave, Harry Potter films

Warner Bros. Pictures

Warner Bros. Pictures

The recasting of Lavender Brown from The Chamber of Secrets to Prisoner of Azkaban to Half-Blood Prince is notable for one very particular, and uncomfortable reason. When Brown first appeared in Secrets, she was Black British. She popped up again in Azkaban, played by a different actress, but still Black British. It was only when the part was expanded on later in the series, that a new, notably whiter actress was cast to play the part.

Now, it’s understandable that Jennifer Smith was replaced. Going off of her IMDB page, she acted neither before nor after her one, dialogue-less role in Azkaban. A more accomplished actress was obviously required to fight for the future of wizard kind, but after two movies of being black, the fact that she was recast lily white to have a romance with Ron Wealsey certainly raised some eyebrows. There may have been other, more concrete reasons a new actress was brought on board (the role was originally a non-speaking background character assigned the name Lavender Brown), but the uncomfortable quality of this recasting lands it squarely on the worst list.


Best: Alec Baldwin to Harrison Ford, The Jack Ryan movies

Paramount Pictures

Paramount Pictures

In many ways, Alec Baldwin in a national treasure. He can tear up the screen in a Scorsese movie, and then get downright goofy hosting SNL. He is a man of immense talent, but you’d be hard-pressed to find anyone who would rather watch an action movie starring him than Harrison Ford.  After Star Wars and Indiana Jones, Ford proved himself to be perhaps the biggest movie star of his generation. When Baldwin played hard to get for the Hunt for Red October sequel, the script slid Ford’s way, and Baldwin found himself minus one franchise.

Paramount Pictures
Paramount Pictures

While Red October is a solid film, Ford helped bring Jack Ryan front and center for the more action-packed Patriot Games and Clear and Present Danger. Baldwin would rebound as an in-demand character actor, but Ford would take the franchise to new, finger wagging heights.


Worst: Linda Hamilton to Emilia Clarke, Terminator franchise

Tristar Pictures

Tristar Pictures

Emilia Clarke may be the mother of dragons, but she proved she couldn’t hold a candle to Linda Hamilton when it came to playing mother of the resistance Sarah Conner. Hamilton, who originated the role in 1984’s Terminator, as a nervous waitress in over her head, proved a revelation when she rebuilt herself into a killing machine for the 1991 sequel Terminator 2: Judgment Day.

Paramount

Paramount

 

By the time Clarke found her way to the role in oddly spelled 2015’s Terminator Genisys, Sarah Conner had already been rebooted once on television, but had sat dormant on the big screen for more than twenty years. Sadly, her take on the part wasn’t much of a take at all. She wore the tank top, but failed to bring any of the hard-ass gravitas to the role.Genisys was a letdown in every way possible, but the fact that it exposed Khaleesi’s limited acting range was perhaps its most unforgivable sin.


Best: Elaine Baker and Clive Revill to Ian McDiarmid, Star Wars movies

When the time came, in The Empire Strikes Back, for the wicked Emperor to make an appearance, makeup guru Rick Baker did what anyone would do. He cast his wife in the part, superimposed chimpanzee eyes over her face, and had actor Clive Revill dub in the lines. That’s just common sense.

Lucas Films

Lucas Films

When Return of the Jedi rolled around a few years later, it was clear the same approach would not work for the much-expanded part, and Ian McDiarmid was cast. His deliciously evil interpretation of the Sith lord became iconic, unfortunately to such an extent that famous noodler George Lucas went back and inserted him in the 2004 Empire DVD release. While we were sad to see the more DIY approach to the Emperor banished from the Star Wars movies, there can be no doubt that McDiarmid created one of the all-time great screen villains.


Worst: Bill Murray to Dan Aykroyd, Caddyshack II

Warner Bros.

Warner Bros.

Look, we love Dan Aykroyd. Who doesn’t? From Blue Brothers to Ghostbusters, he’s been behind some of the all-time great comedies. But signing on to a sinking ship like Caddyshack II, whose sole reason for being was to use the catchphrase “The Shack is Back,” seems like an incredibly shortsighted idea.

Keep in mind, every original cast member, save Chevy Chase, wanted nothing to do with this movie, and cowriter Harold Ramis fought to have his name taken off of it. While Aykroyd doesn’t technically play the same character that Murray created in the original, a name change can’t hide that the part was clearly written for “The Murricane,” and switched around during a last second scramble. If a movie could have flop sweat, this travesty would be soaking wet. Aykroyd would go on to many more successes, but wading in Murray’s wake through this flop did him no favors.

Portlandia Fred Armisen Austin

Austin City Tidbits

10 Things You Need to Know Before Moving to Austin

Fred moves to Austin in an all-new Portlandia tonight at 10P on IFC.

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This week on Portlandia, co-star Fred Armisen does the unthinkable. Abandoning the very heart of the show and rendering its title geographically incorrect, he decides to move to Austin. Sure, the laid-back, artist-friendly atmosphere would be a painless transition, but there are a few things you should keep in mind before you move there.

Here are some facts about Austin you need to know. And check out Fred’s journey to Austin on an all-new Portlandia tonight at 10P on IFC. (Click here to find IFC on your TV in your area.)

1. It’s home to the largest urban bat colony in North America.

portlandia-season-five-goth-halloween

Accommodating 750,000 bats in the spring and summer — with population spikes to 1.5 million during the peak season — Austin is no place for chiroptophobics. (Yes, we had to look it up.) With this staggering bat to belfry ratio, it’s the perfect city for nocturnal crimefighters and goths really into “theme” funerals.


2. It’s the exact opposite of Portland (sun-wise).

portlandia-the-sun-fred-armisen-carrie-brownstein

The Pacific Northwest isn’t known for its overbearing sunlight, and with less than 40% of sunny days per year, Portland isn’t exactly home to scorching driveways you can fry an egg on. Compare that to Austin, whose 300 days of sun per year will clear that vitamin D deficiency right up.


3. It’s the birthplace of Whole Foods.

Fred Armisen Whole Foods

Started in 1978 by two college dropouts and a $45,000 loan, Whole Foods is an organic gourmand’s American dream. Cuisine-focused Portlanders would find the transition easy to make, and those open to the whole squatting scene will be pleased to know Whole Foods’ founders briefly lived in their first shop and bathed in the dishwasher.


4. It’s also one of the healthiest cities in America.

IFC Originals

Whole Foods wasn’t an aberration. Healthy living’s a big priority in Austin and largely responsible for the 250 gyms, yoga studios, healthy restaurants, and health food stores throughout the city. But bear in mind, not every yoga partner’s going to have your best interests in mind.


5. It’s super dog-friendly.

Lovers of our four-legged friends will be pleased to discover that Austin holds our furry pals in the highest regard. Dog Fancy dubbed the city “DogTown USA,” and its many off-leash parks, swimming holes, and retailers catering to canines ought to keep the ankle-biters happy and Portland’s many animal activists from interrupting other people’s lunches.


6. It’s a haven for artists and musicians.

portlandia-season-4-dvd

If you happen to be handy with a brush or a guitar pick in Texas, then chances are you’re an Austinite. The city has the highest number of artists and musicians per capita in the entire state, making it a huge draw for fiscally challenged creatives.


7. It’s officially the Live Music Capital of the World.

Adopting the name in 1991, Austin hosts nearly 200 live music venues around town, thereby earning it another “per capita” claim: most live music venues. In fact, if concert bookers aren’t careful, they run the risk of double-booking two different Flaming Lips.


8. It’s a city of dedicated bookworms.

Fans of the printed word are sure to meet fellow hardbackers in Austin. Residents frequent their local bookshops with such frequency, the city draws the highest annual bookstore sales in the country, at nearly $200 per household. Of course, it’s best to know what the store owners are like ahead of time.


9. The Alamo Drafthouse is the best place to catch a movie.

portlandia-artisanal-popcorn

Heralded as the finest movie theater in the country, Austin’s Alamo Drafthouse is paradise for the discerning cinemagoer. With a strict “no talking or texting” policy and prohibitive access for unaccompanied minors, it’s a far cry from the distraction free-for-all that is your local multiplex.


10. It’s basically the Portland of the South.

Packed to the gills with artists, musicians, hipsters, freaks, and oddballs that continues to “Keep Austin Weird,” the city has almost all of the elements that makes Portland, Oregon just as eccentric. And we hear that its mayor bares a striking resemblance to Portland’s mayor, albeit with a sweet ‘stache.

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