DID YOU READ

Interview: Chazz Palminteri on “Yonkers Joe”

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01072008_yonkersjoe1.jpgBy Aaron Hillis

If New York-born actor (and sometime writer/director) Chazz Palminteri were just a decade older, he probably would’ve been an Italian-American staple in the ’70s films of Martin Scorsese and Francis Ford Coppola. Instead, during that time he studied at the Actors Studio with Lee Strasberg, then made his way to off-Broadway and TV shows in the ’80s before writing the 1988 play “A Bronx Tale” that would eventually be adapted for the screen as Robert De Niro’s directorial debut and offer him his breakout movie role. Now one of the most prominent Italian-American actors working today, Palminteri currently stars as the titular Vegas shark in “Yonkers Joe,” an entertaining drama about a con man whose seedy world of palming dice, cheating casinos, and conning any poor sucker is uprooted when he’s forced to look after his adult son with Down’s syndrome. I took a seat with Palminteri (while writer/director Robert Celestino quietly looked on) to talk about his cultural background, fatherhood and his New Year’s resolutions.

Are you a gambling man?

Yeah, I like to gamble. Am I like Yonkers? No, but I’ll go to Vegas and gamble a little bit. Why not? I like playing roulette, I like dice. I grew up with gamblers. But the way Yonkers is, which is really fascinating to me, it’s kind of this subculture of people, like magicians with dice and cards. Here’s this guy who’s great at what he does, but he can’t tell anybody because if he does, he’ll get killed. And if he tells his friends, his friends won’t use him anymore. So he lives a life of being kind of lonely.

How long did it take you pick up those sleight-of-hand tricks you perform through the film?

Well, obviously, could I do it like the real Yonkers Joe? No. But Bob, the writer-director, that was his father. Bob can do it as good as his dad can because his father taught him — Bob was teaching me. The beauty of film is that I would study it for hours and hours, but if I do it one out of ten times, that’s the take we’d use. I would screw up a lot, but the one that I did it right, that’s the one we used, so it was okay.

I like that the film never feels obligated to judge this character’s moral compass, considering he regularly rips people off.

01072008_yonkersjoe.jpgNo, that’s what he does. There’s no apologizing, that’s what it is. When you read the script, some people would say: “How do you root for a guy like this?” You end up rooting for him because you don’t have to like him as much. But if you understand him, you’ll start to like him.

You’ve taken a lot of roles that reflect your Italian-American background. Are you offered a ton of projects that play into cultural stereotypes, like gangster movies?

Yeah, and I usually don’t do them. [laughs] That’s why I do movies like “A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints,” “Yonkers Joe,” or “Once More with Feeling,” that I have at Sundance. I don’t want to play a goombah character if he’s just one note. I’m very proud of being Italian-American, but people don’t realize that the mafia is just this aberration. The real community is built on the working man, the guy who’s the cop, the fireman, the truck driver, the bus driver. This is my father. These mafia guys get all the press because they’re fun to write about, they’re fun to watch. That’s why I wrote “A Bronx Tale.” The working guy’s the tough guy: “It doesn’t take much strength to pull the trigger, son.” He says that in the movie, that’s why it was important for me.

Not that you’ve had to take care of a child with Down’s syndrome, but can you think of anything in your own life that has been a tough responsibility?

Not like that. God bless the parents who handle things like that. I’m astounded by them. I have a friend who has a son with Down’s syndrome. He’s about 30 years old, the boy, and the things that they went through in the very beginning: in school, in talking with girls, and the things that he would say in front of people — they would just say anything. You’d get embarrassed: “Oh my god!” And you know what? The child has brought them nothing but joy. So my heart goes out to anyone who has a special needs child, and the work that they must have to do, the constant supervision, and the love. I’m so grateful to be a father, and I have two healthy children, and it made me even more grateful for my kids when I saw how hard it is.

Well, but what about you? What frustrating obligations have you personally embraced?

Well, I think… [deep breath] I don’t know if I should talk about this, but… yeah, I guess so. My father, who was 89, passed away a year ago. He was the inspiration and essence of Lorenzo Anello in “A Bronx Tale,” the character played by Robert De Niro. He was healthy all his life, and then he got sick. For six or seven weeks, he deteriorated, and we knew it was time for him to go. That was it. Holding the family together, I thought I’d be the basket case of all the kids, but I ended up manning up and taking control with my mom and my sisters. I guess I had to, for whatever reason. No one else could. I was looking for someone else to take over, but I had to do it. I’m happy I was there at the end, and I never thought I could do that, but I thank God everyday that I did.

01072008_yonkersjoe2.jpgBesides Celestino, you’ve worked with other up-and-coming filmmakers before. What do you like about working on a project where you’re the veteran and they’re a bit green?

I love people who just started making movies — first-timers, second-timers. They take chances. Usually, they have a script that they’ve had for 20 years that’s really good that no one wants to make, so you want to do it. I think Bob wrote the script maybe 10, 15 ago years, Bob? [Celestino nods.] 15 years. You try to make it and it falls through. You get the money and you don’t have the actor, or you get the actor and you don’t have the money. It’s a nightmare. So finally, if the right actor comes at the right time, I don’t know. I’m happy with the movie, and I can’t picture anybody else doing “Yonkers Joe.” Could you, Bob? [Celestino shakes his head emphatically.] Well, he wouldn’t tell me anyway. [laughs]

How did you two get connected?

He sent the script to the agent, and the agent gave it to me and I read it. Great material gets a response right away because you don’t read much of it. I read a lot of scripts, and most are bullshit. Most scripts are 60% written — you like the ending, the beginning, you might like the middle, but then you read it, and you get 30 pages before you put your head down. I just like a good story, and a character that has flaws and complexities. Could you compare the Yonkers Joe character to anybody in the history of films? “Yonkers Joe is like the guy in…” I can’t do that. I say that honestly. So when I see a movie that’s so original and has three-dimensional pull to it, this subculture of gamblers and the guy has a son with Down syndrome? Show me a movie like that, I haven’t seen it.

Entering this depressing economic year, how much does the potential SAG strike affect you and your upcoming projects?

Obviously, the country is having a tough time right now. Is now the time to strike? I hope not. But I’m only one voice here. There are other actors who have different agendas, and maybe they want to strike for whatever reason. I mean, could we give away the store? No, we can’t give away all Internet rights and things like that. I want to hear both sides a little more. I just don’t think now is the time to strike. I think it would make a bad situation worse.

Do you have any New Year’s resolutions?

Yeah, I just try to be better than I was the year before. I know that sounds lame a little bit, but I go: “Okay, well, what could I do this year that I didn’t do great last year?” I try to be the best father I can be. You could be a billionaire and live in the biggest mansion, but if your kids don’t love you, what success do you have?

01072008_yonkersjoe3.jpgWhat’s been most surprising about fatherhood for you?

I think checking yourself because you are a mirror to your children. You have to get yourself in shape because whatever you are, your children will become. If you’re mean to people, your children will be mean to people. If you’re an asshole, your children will become assholes.

My children are good kids. I taught them that [skin] color means nothing. I have friends who are African-American, and I wanted them to talk to them, hang with them. I don’t want them to one day say, “Oh, gee, there’s other people with different colors than us?” I wrote “A Bronx Tale” because of racism. It’s a big issue with me. You’re not born a racist. You’re taught to be a racist. When you see, like in the South, those five-year-olds walking around with sheets on their heads, what’s more despicable than that? So you teach your kids not to be racist, and they will teach their kids, and their kids will teach their kids. My legacy as a father, I hope, is that our children will welcome everyone.

You’ve played so many tough guy roles. Are you a strict father?

Yes, I am. Sometimes a little too tough? I can be. But I work on that. My wife isn’t as tough, but she balances me out a little bit.

[Photos: Chazz Palminteri in “Yonkers Joe,” Magnolia Pictures, 2008]

“Yonkers Joe” opens in New York and Los Angeles on January 9th.

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Very NSFW

The Brockmire Premiere Is All Truth

Watch The First Episode of Brockmire Right Now for Free

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GIFS via Giphy

At long last, the Brockmire pre-premiere has arrived. Which means you can watch it right now—on IFC.com, at Funny Or Die, on IFC’s Apple TV and mobile apps, on Youtube, on Facebook, on the AMC apps, and right here. So grab some headphones and get watching.

No seriously, get headphones.

Because whether he’s giving a play-by-play or ruminating on the world around him, Jim Brockmire calls it like he sees it. And how he sees it is very NSFW. His take on life is actually quite refreshing, even to the point of being profoundly sage. For proof just look at these pearls of unconventional wisdom from the premiere…

Brockmire On The Internet

“If I need porn I just buy a nudie mag, like my father and his father before him.”

Brockmire On Sex-Ed

“Kids, a strap-on is a belt with d— on it that mommies use to f— daddies.”
Brockmire-Strap-On

Brockmire On The Perfect High

“Somewhere between 10 cups of coffee and very low-grade cocaine.”
Brockmire-Perfect-High

Brockmire On The Tardiness of Spring

“Old man winter’s reaching his hand inside your coat to give that thing one more squeeze.”

Brockmire On Keeping Perspective

“I thought I hit rock bottom in a handicap restroom in Bangkok where a Thai lady-boy snorted crank off my johnson while a sunburnt German watched us on the toilet”
Brockmire-grain-salt

Brockmire On Humanity

“If you want to look directly into the gaping maw of oblivion, don’t look up to the heavens. Just look in the mirror.”
Jules-never-seen

See these nuggets and more in the first episode of Brockmire, and see the whole season beginning April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Brockmire-Hank-Azaria-characters-blog

Thank Azaria

Best. Characters. Ever.

Our favorite Hank Azaria characters.

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Hank Azaria may well be the most prolific voice and character actor of our time. The work he’s done for The Simpsons alone has earned him a permanent place in the pop culture zeitgeist. And now he’s bringing another character to the mainstream: a washed-up sports announcer named Jim Brockmire, in the aptly titled new series Brockmire.

We’re looking forward to it. So much so that we want to look backward, too, with a short-but-sweet retrospective of some of Azaria’s important characters. Shall we begin?

Half The Recurring Simpsons Characters

He’s Comic Book Guy. He’s Chief Wiggum. He’s Apu. He’s Cletus. He’s Snake. He’s Superintendent Chalmers. He’s the Sea Captain. He’s Kurt “Can I Borrow A Feeling” Van Houten. He’s Professor Frink. He’s Carl. And he’s many more. But most importantly he’s Moe Szyslak, the staple character Azaria has voiced since his very first audition for The Simpsons.

Oh, and He’s Frank Grimes

For all the regular Simpsons characters Azaria has played over the years, his most brilliant performance may have been a one-off: Frank Grimes, the scrappy bootstrapper who worked tirelessly all his life for honest, incremental, and easily-undermined success. Azaria’s portrayal of this character was nuanced, emotional, and simply magical.

Patches O’Houlihan

Dodgeball is a “sport of violence, exclusion and degradation.” as Hank Azaria generously points out in his brief but crucial cameo in Dodgeball. That’s sage wisdom. Try applying his “five D’s” to your life on and off the court and enjoy the results.

Harold Zoid

Of Futurama fame. The crazy uncle of Dr. Zoidberg, Harold Zoid was once a lion (or lobster) of the silver screen until Smell-o-vision forced him into retirement.

Agador

The Birdcage was significant for many reasons, and the comic genius of Hank Azaria’s character “Agador” sits somewhere towards the top of that list. If you haven’t seen this movie, shame on you.

Gargamel

Nobody else could make a live-action Gargamel possible.

Ed Cochran

From Ray Donovan. Great character, great last name [editorial note: the author of this article may be bias].

Kahmunra, The Thinker, Abe Lincoln

All in the Night At The Museum: Battle Of The Smithsonian, a file that let Azaria flex his voice acting and live-action muscles in one fell swoop.

The Blue Raja

Mystery Men has everything, including a fatal case of Smash Mouth. Azaria’s iconic superhero makes the shortlist of redeemable qualities, though.

Dr. Huff

Huff put Azaria in a leading role, and it was good. So good that there is no good gif of it. Internet? More like Inter-not.

Learn more about Hank Azaria’s newest claim to fame right here, and don’t miss the premiere of Brockmire April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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Sneak_Peek

Flame Out

Brockmire and Other Public Implosions

Brockmire Premieres April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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There’s less than a month until the Brockmire premiere, and to say we’re excited would be an insulting understatement. It’s not just that it stars Hank Azaria, who can do no wrong (and yes, that’s including Mystery Men, which is only cringeworthy because of Smash Mouth). It’s that the whole backstory of the titular character, Jim Brockmire, is the stuff of legends. A one-time iconic sportscaster who won the hearts of fans and players alike, he fell from grace after an unfortunate personal event triggered a seriously public meltdown. See for yourself in the NSFW Funny or Die digital short that spawned the IFC series:

See? NSFW and spectacularly catastrophic in a way that could almost be real. Which got us thinking: What are some real-life sports fails that have nothing to do with botched athletics and everything to do with going tragically off script? The internet is a dark and dirty place, friends, but these three examples are pretty special and mostly safe for work…

Disgruntled Sports Reporter

His co-anchor went offsides and he called it like he saw it.

Jim Rome vs Jim “Not Chris” Everett

You just don’t heckle a professional athlete when you’re within striking distance. Common sense.

Carl Lewis’s National Anthem

He killed it! As in murdered. It’s dead.

To see more moments just like these, we recommend spending a day in your pajamas combing through the muckiness of the internet. But to see something that’s Brockmire-level funny without having to clear your browser history, check out the sneak peeks and extras here.

Don’t miss the premiere of Brockmire April 5 at 10P on IFC.

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