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DID YOU READ

Oscar melancholy.

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Telling me what?
We ended up having to put ourselves to bed at 11pm on Sunday, and missed seeing the bulk of the major awards handed out to their expected recipients. Given that we had successfully called the triumphs of both "Happy Feet" and "The Lives of Others," we felt a reassuringly smug warmth that we’d turn out to be correct on most of our other predictions, though that might have just been the rather high fever we were running. Sadly, post-Oscar coverage is lacking in any similar smug warmth, and seems instead, after an admittedly deathly boring ceremony, to be suffused with a decided end-of-season melancholy — a sense of "we spent so much time talking up… that?"

"On this broadcast of ‘the most international of Oscars,’" sighs Stephanie Zacharek at Salon, "Penélope Cruz was mistaken for Mexican, the Hong Kong film "Infernal Affairs" was cited as being Japanese, and George ‘Turkey Neck’ Lucas called Stephen Frears ‘Stephen Fears.’ Film: It really is the international language, but some of these names are damn hard to pronounce." "What a damp squib of a night for Britain," writes the Guardian‘s Peter Bradshaw, who’d been hoping for "monumental British renaissance in Hollywood."

"The letdown began long before the evening wrapped up, but that was to be expected," posits Alessandra Stanley at the New York Times. "Oscar night is the new Christmas, a commercialized tinsel-and-treacle holiday for adults." And her colleague Dave Carr has composed a piece suffused with even more forlorn, "A Charlie Brown Christmas"-style sentiments:

Out of a mutuality of interests — we both serve our publics — the stars smile, I smile and we call each other by name. But the pantomime is difficult to sustain. I remember walking outside for a smoke during the Screen Actors Guild Awards show and seeing the carpet that just a few hours ago had hosted all manner of glamour and star-power. Already the ropes were down, the bleachers had been struck, and the carpet was being rolled up for the next event. The moveable feast is so, so fleeting. Very little was left besides the empty water bottles.

Sarah Rodman at the Boston Globe darkly prophesies obscurity for Jennifer Hudson: "Try to imagine for a moment Hudson in another role, especially a non-singing one. Take away the parts played by Queen Latifah over the last few years and what can you picture her in?" Patrick Goldstein at the LA Times, on the other hand, halfway argues for a place in the canon for "The Departed" on the basis of its not often award-friendly genre nature. As happy as we are that Scorsese won, we can’t see "The Departed" sticking around as more than a footnote in his career. Goldstein may be right in arguing that genre films age better, but "The Departed" just lacks that spark of life that gives so many of the films he namechecks in his article lasting appeal.

Finally,Tim Teeman at the London Times found Ellen DeGeneres‘ hosting to be more than a little off, writing that she "seem[ed] neutered by the demands to act as respectably as possible while also mocking the audience and the absurdities and excesses of the world of film." You must admit, it’s a thankless job.

+ Regarding Oscar (Salon)
+ The Oscars: a final verdict (Guardian)
+ Bringing a Touch of Daytime to Hollywood’s Biggest Night
(NY Times)
+ Red Carpet Confidential (NY Times)
+ Will ‘Dreamgirls’ song stop their show? (Boston Globe)
+ Welcome to the club (LA Times)
+ A rush, a crush and … a par-tay? (LA Times)

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Rev Up

Your Portlandia Personality Test

The New Portlandia Webseries Is Going Your Way

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Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

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Uncle-Buck

Give Back

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

Hits from the '80s are on repeat all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC.

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GIFs via Giphy, Photos via The Everett Collection

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.



Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

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A-O Rewind

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

The final season of Portlandia approaches.

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GIFs via Giphy

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.

via GIPHY

Put A Bird On It

Portlandia enters the pop-culture lexicon and inspires us to put birds on literally everything.

Colin the Chicken

Who’s your chicken, really? Behold the emerging locavore trend captured perfectly to the nth degree.

Dream Of The ’90s

This treatise on Portland made it clear that “the dream” was alive and well.

No You Go

We Americans spend most of our lives in cars. Fortunately, there’s a Portlandia sketch for every automotive situation.

A-O River!

We learned all our outdoor survival skills from Kath and Dave.

One More Episode

The true birth of binge watching, pre-Netflix. And what you’ll do once Season 8 premieres.

Catch up on Portlandia’s best moments before the 8th season premieres January 18th on IFC.

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